Allison and Kid

Chapter 23: Drunk, Cold, and Miserable Winter Nights

FEBRUARY 1, 2021 | DURHAM COLLEGE, OSHAWA, ONTARIO, CANADA | KID ROXAS

It's a cold day. Marco and I went to the cafeteria after our classes. I chose not to continue taking Law and pursued my dream while my best bud persevered still.

I saw him waiting for me at our usual spot.

"Hey, Jackie!" Marco greeted

"Hey, El Chapo!"

"How's life going?"

"Still the same. How about you?"

"Well, great! My daughter is doing well in school. You know, she got it from me."

"That's the spirit, man!"

"How are you? What happened to you and Allison? You didn't mention her for maybe like two months."

"We don't talk anymore, dude."

"What happened? Are we going to sue her?"

"No. It's me, Marco. I left Allie and now I don't know how to approach her."

"Do you still love her?"

"I never dated anyone after her."

"Is she with someone new?"

"I don't know, dude. Based on what I see on social media, there's none but who knows right? She's somehow mysterious, you know? She's active on social media but it's hard to tell if she's in a relationship or not."

"How did you leave her?"

"I just ignored her."

"Too bad, Jackie. Too bad."

"I know."

"Have you tried again?"

"No, I don't know how."

"You know how, dude. You're just not trying. It's up to you. If you want to lose her, let her go. If you don't, do something. I remember you told me that Allie is different and you want to be with her in the future. If you still feel the same, go for it. It's hard to lose the love of your life, man. Learn from the divorced dad."

I realized he's right. I'm such a coward. I must do something and maybe I'd get her back.

I went straight to gym after catching up with my friend. While working out, I planned things on my mind. Valentine's Day is coming. Maybe surprising her with flowers will do but I still don't know her address.

I remember that she has a younger sister named Callah so I thought maybe she could help me. I'm desperate this time. I need someone close to Allie to help me. I sent her a message on messenger about my problem. On that time, I told myself that if she'll answer, it means that I should go for it and there's no coming back.

I went to my apartment and had my dinner but there's still nothing from Callah. I was losing hope when my phone vibrated.

"Hi! Sure no problem. Wala namang boyfriend si Ate so baka friends nya lang kasama nya sa 14." She answered

It's a huge relief for me. We're the same. I never dated anyone else after her.

I saw that she's still typing.

"Kaso si Ate Jean kasal na tapos si Ate Chels may boyfriend. Siguro sila ni Kuya Tan lalabas." She added

So Jean is already married and for sure Chelsea will celebrate that day with her boyfriend. There's a huge chance that Woodlawn will spend the day with her. I think he's planning something. It'll be pretty hard for me. Geez, may the best man win.

"Do you think Allie would love to receive flowers?" I asked

"I think so. Pero kuya allergic sya sa flowers a. Pero sure naman akong magugustuhan nya yun. Masaya na yun na naalala sya."

"May I know your address? I'm planning to send her flowers."

"Sure."

Then Callah gave me their address. I never knew that they moved to Valenzuela. I thought they're still staying at Bago Bantay, Quezon City.

I thanked Callah for helping me and I asked her not to tell her sister about it. She told me that I can trust her even said "Good luck".

I went out to buy a drink. I know my thoughts will never let me sleep. I started to drink since I left Allison. It's a huge mistake to leave her. I shouldn't have done that but I did and now I don't know what to say if I ever see her again. I can't even call her and my heart beats fast as I see her name. I check her accounts again and again hoping to see her smile. It looks like she's fine without me. I'm scared to think that she realized she doesn't need me because I need her. I need her badly.

I thought I'm strong enough.

I thought I just miss her.

I did that because I'm miserable and she's too beautiful to be dragged to where I am now.

I was wrong.

She was there for me

To cheer me up

To support me

To be beside me

There's a lot of guys but she chose me.

Nathan was there all along but she chose me.

Will she ever choose me again?

I'm longing for home.