BTS Sickfics

Taehyung: Idol VS Stage Floor

theres 100 of these fuckers. woohoo.

bro idk what the hell the name is, im just sick of labelling every chapter for literally what it is. screw it. idc.

request by aetaestic :)

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Taehyung's POV -

Do you know the definition of being overworked? Because that is what I am right now. I think all of us are overworked. It happens every tour, and I really fucking hate it. I want to enjoy every concert, and try to remember as many faces as I can, but it's impossible when your head is spinning so much and you can't catch your breath.

Concerts are tiring for every artist in the world. Tour dates are close together, and you spend a long time being cooped up in a bus or in a plane, travelling from country to country. You have the sound checks, the outfit changes, the routine checks, the safety checks, it just feels like it'll never end. As a kpop group, we're pushed even further, and told to try harder. Even with the sound and routine checks, we have to have dance practices, and special warm ups. Even on days when we don't have a concert, we never stop performing.

On top of that, there's always a big push for us to go out and see the city that we're staying in. That means we have to make time to go and walk around for an hour or two, which, although is fun, and gives you some good memories, when you're so exhausted all you want to do is sleep, the last thing you want is to traipse around a busy city centre.

As each comeback comes, I hope more and more that my body will get used to the constant moving, and the cramped, rushed spaces, but I never do. I feel dizzy and out of place, and sometimes I need help with my breathing. Of course, I'm not the only one who feels that way. We all go through it.

When Jungkook nearly collapsed in Chile during the Wings tour, I thought that was when we would be able to catch a break, and the managers would see how much we're straining ourselves, but nothing changed. We just had to keep moving, and keep performing. If you got hurt, you have to put on a mask and pretend it never happened.

The thing is, if it can happen, then it'll definitely happen again. If Jungkook, of all people, can be the one to suffer, then there's no hope for the rest of us. Jungkook is by far the strongest of us all, and not even he can cope with all of this.

I think it might be me.

*

I wake up with a headache, feeling a flutter of anxiety - or nausea - in my stomach. We're in the final quarter of the tour, and we're in the UK, ready to end the Europe tour. This is always the worst part of the tour, as we're pretty much all burnt out. I don't know where I can summon more energy from.

I stumble out of bed, feeling my head spin with too much movement. During the tour, I often wake up in a dizzy spell, since we don't look after ourselves well, so I can't really say I'm worried about it. I give my eyes a long rub, swaying gently on my feet as I remove the small pieces of sleep dust from the corner of my eyes.

I wee with my eyes still mostly shut, scratching my ass. I frown as the headache gives my eyebrow a little stab, but I think it'll go away by the time I eat and drink something. A nice warm shower sounds amazing right now.

I strip off my PJs, and give myself a good stretch before I turn the water on, using the tips of my toes to measure how hot the water is. I give the handle the tiniest nudge right, but the water becomes boiling hot, so I quickly nudge it back left. Now it's freezing.

It takes a few minutes to minutely edge the handle to the temperature I want the water to be, and I finally step in, letting the pleasantly warm water wash through my hair and down my body. I turn my face up into the water's stream, my eyes shut, letting the power drum onto my eyelids, soothing the crabby itchiness of sleep. It's so lulling I feel the need to sit down, and just enjoy the warm water.