Heaven From Here

twenty

Hanna stirred half asleep, she could hear the rustling of sheets, or was it clothes in the darkness of the room. Her fingers blindly searched for the light switch by the bedside. Flicking it on, she caught the outline of Saif bent in prostration by the foot of her bed. With his hands held up in prayer, his lips moved in silence as he said his du'a. His eyes met Hanna's sleep filled gaze, and his lips lifted in a small smile.

Finishing his prayer, he stood up and folded the prayer mat. Hanna watched Saif in silence as she studied the ripples of his muscles as he moved. It was the first time that they were in the same room together Hanna realized as she tracked his movement with cautious eyes. She pulled the duvet closer to her chest as Saif made to sit in front of her on the bed. Although he was an arm's length away, it still made her nervous.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, his voice still gravelly from sleep. "I'm sorry if I woke you."

Hanna shook her head, "It's okay."

"Hanna - ," Saif said as he leaned forward but froze as he saw Hanna shrink back into the headboard. "I...ah, you asked me to sleep here last night..."

"...I did..."

"...I'll...ah...leave now...," Saif said after a long pause, as he ran his palm against his jaw.

"...Stay," he heard Hanna's voice say softly, as he froze in the middle of standing up. He sank back down on the bed and looked up to see Hanna studying him intently.

If there was a picture of what heartbreak looked like, Hanna supposed Saif's face would be it. The soft light from the lamp casted shadows on his face, as it highlighted his strong jaw that was covered in stubble and sharp cheek bones. The line of his nose was proud but the curve of the cupid's bow hinted at the fullness of his lips.

How in the world can someone look this perfect in the middle of the damn night, Hanna wondered. The alarm on Hanna's phone chirped snapping her out of her reverie, signalling the time for her to say her Fajr prayers. Slowly removing the covers, Hanna got up on unsteady feet.

"I...I'll be right back," she said as she headed to the bathroom and took her wudhu. Back in her room, she noticed that Saif hadn't moved from his spot on the bed. He watched her as she stood on the prayer mat. Hanna took a deep breath and with her eyes closed she started performing her prayers.

Saif watched as she said her prayers. Her movements soft and graceful; like she was truly at ease. As soon as she was done and their gazes met, Saif could see the tension creeping back into her shoulders and around her eyes.

"Hanna," his voice a rich velvet in the dimness of the room, "come here."

He could see her visibly swallow as she walked woodenly towards him. Standing three feet apart, Hanna looked down at Saif nervously.

"I want to try something," he said as tapped the bed, gesturing for Hanna to sit there.

Hanna raised her eyebrow apprehensively, "What? What do you want to try?"

"There's a massage that we do at the clinic, to help relax the animals. I think it might help you," Saif said gently.

"I'm not tense," Hanna shot back even though she could feel the stiffness of her shoulders.

Saif cocked an eyebrow and said, "Hanna, your shoulders are up to your ears. Come. Sit."

Hanna robotically sat down facing Saif, her eyes wide with uncertainty.

"Hanna," he said in that same soft velvety voice, "I need you to turn and face the wall; away from me." Hanna nodded stoically and adjusted herself according, all the while wondering why was she even listening to him.