Just For Tonight

Safety Net.

"Put a price on emotion. I'm looking for something to buy. You've got my devotion. But man, I can hate you sometimes. I don't want to fight you. And I don't want to sleep in the dirt."

"Ashtyn," Christian says quietly dragging it out slightly as he squeezes my hand that we must've fallen asleep holding. "Ash," he says again only this time shaking my arm a little our hands still intertwined. 

"Hm?" My eyes still closed not really wanting to be awake right now. I wasn't until two seconds ago either.

"We gonna stay on the couch now or do you wanna head to bed?" Christian asks resting our arms back down over my belly as his opposite hand plays aimlessly in my hair. Stretching out a little Christian and I both feel a particularly big kick from my baby girl before both of us laugh a little. 

"Morning to you too kid," I mumble snuggling closer to Christian as I'm more comfortable than I've been in a long time. 

Christian laughs a little hugging me slightly into him, "So couch or head to bed?" 

"Whatever you wanna do," I reply mumbling not really ready to be up and moving right now even if my baby is. 

"Let's head to bed then, might be more comfortable than this couch. Even if you seem to be incredibly comfortable here." 

"I am," I tell him giggling a little to myself stretching once again before finally opening my eyes again. "Which room do you want?" 

"I don't think it matters does it?" He asks and I just shake my head, "Well get up then lazy and pick one." I scoff a little shaking my head again before I manage to get up, Christian very close behind me. Heading over to the closest room I pop my head in the door and look around it once before heading across the living room again as Christian watches and glancing in the other. They're like the exact same. I don't really know what my expectation was, but they're the same. 

"Well this one is closest to the bathroom so," I comment, "I guess me and the little one shoved against my bladder will take it."  

"Oh," Christian says nodding with a small laugh, "Alright." 

"Yeah," I say, "I guess goodnight?"

"Night," Christian replies, "Let me know if you need anything." I just nod and give him a small smile before heading into my room for tonight. We're definitely in an incredibly weird position right now. We're having a baby together but we don't really know each other yet. It's something we're figuring out and working on. I can't deny that I really do enjoy being with him and that it's incredibly easy to be comfortable with him, but we're in an incredibly strange position here where we're trying to figure everything with us out while also preparing to welcome this baby into the world. Would I even feel this close to him if I wasn't pregnant with this baby right now? I know that we wouldn't even be in this position if it weren't for this baby, but where would we be had we decided to be more than that one nightstand. Beyond this kid, where would we be had we chosen for ourselves that we wanted to get to know each other and spend this sort of time with each other without this forcing us together? 

Crawling into the bed and getting under the covers I check my phone quick before setting it to the side and closing my eyes again. Adjusting here and there trying to find a comfortable position. See on the couch it was really easy to fall asleep and really easy to be comfortable and now, now I'm stuck again trying to figure out what works. Maybe Christian has something to do with it. Crazy to think that only about a month and a half ago he was being a complete dick and now here we are on a fucking road trip with one another and me thinking that Christian makes it easier for me to fall asleep. Dude's warm and very nice to be held by, tight, but not too tight, just enough that there's security to it, almost like a safety net in a sense.