until february 28 | jaesung

8. who was she?

The great amount of sleeplessness is surely concerning. It causes digestive problems, exhaustion, muscle weakness, several allergy reaction and of course that the affect is not just summarized in your body condition. Adding the fact that you don't get to have a proper nutrition can tell that you won't be able to manage your mental condition

This way of mistreating your own body makes you weary, angry, tired, quirky and causes unmanageable turbulence

You see lots of nightmares because of your anemia. This one fact alone can be such a big negative affect on an average teenager like you. Also I have to ask you to go a bit easy on yourself with the school exams

We can solve this with your teachers by a simple medical certificate. The amount of compressed studying will add more anxiety and even lack of memory. Even according to what you said earlier about how you keep on forgetting things well I should tell you that this is just a temporary short memory loss which is caused by all the problems you're suffering from. Also you may feel like that you're hallucinating which is also caused by anemia and several nightmares

But with all these matters and reasons...I don't think that just a physical therapy or sleeping in a hospital would solve everything for you. You're meeting your last school semester this year and I should tell you that many students are having the similar problems same as you. Usually mental therapy meetings may help you a lot cause the acts and habits which pains you a lot are not just a matter of your physical health

All of that was what Jisung's doctor told the little boy. Jisung was surely disappointed as his mother took the advantage of doctor's advice for taking his son to therapy meetings again.

Jisung hated those meetings.

Every time that Jisung was sent to these meetings, he tended to look down all the time as if there's no intention or interest in him to discover his surroundings. Little boy could just summarize all the therapy meetings in specified properties.

The therapist is usually a smiling kind lady wearing a distinguished coat, having a proper makeup and speak so softly, eager and friendly as if she's proving to you that she's a good listener. She'll seat in a room which is tried to be made like a comfortable house surrounding. If that therapy room is a house, then Jisung should admit that a house could never make him feel this anxious and awkward.

All the artificial elements that are trying to symbolize the feeling of comfort for the patient seemed pointless to the little boy. A kind good listener, a comfortable house, the chance to speak and the time which is all about you. Jisung just couldn't ignore the fact that everything's artificial.

Mostly, Jisung felt bad for the therapists themselves. Sitting in a quiet room and listening to different stranger's problems, cruel intentions, tough past and their sorrow seemed like a literal suicide to Jisung rather than a job.

That was why Jisung kept his head down as he was sitting in the room in front of his therapist. The therapist moved her long brown hair behind her ear as she looked at the little boy who refused to look back. Putting her leg on the other as she putted her little clipboard on her lap. Seeing a paper on the top of all which consisted all the basic information about her current patient Park Jisung including his therapy record.

"It's so nice to know you Jisung..."

Just a few gentle words heard by a soft voice and that was the moment Jisung couldn't hear her anymore. Little boy refused to listen to the rest of those same old words.

Looking down, playing with his fingers, secretly watching the clock once a while. That was Jisung's method to pass this unwanted meeting as all her wise and organized words were just a vague mumble in the little boy's head.