Saving Sanity

Chapter 20

Here's your extra long and interesting chapter! Enjoy~

I sat silently on the couch. Rylan was going through some 'Rules' about the apartment. "So, first of all. When there is a sock on my bedroom door, don't knock, don't come in or even speak through the door. Okay?" He explained. I nodded. "Next, if there is food in the fridge with my name in it." He paused and stared straight at me with serious eyes. "Do. Not. Eat. It." His voice was stern and deep. I shot my head up. "How about now? What if I'm hungry today?" I asked. He's been pacing back and forth for almost a half an hour. "There is a convenient store across the street. Buy what you want with your money, then put your name on it." I put my head down and stared back at him with the coldest of eyes I can give him. "The reason I'm here with you, is because your uncle offered it to me." He spoke before I was finished. "Duh, I know." Then he murmured under his breath. "If only you just got up your ass and found one yourself." Now I'm pissed. I stood up straight and stared up at him. "Listen here pretty boy. I don't need to explain a damn thing to you about why I'm here, because trust me buddy I would rather sleep under the Boardwalk then stay here with you. I appreciate everything but if you don't want me here I will gladly accept the job with your uncle without staying here." I glared at him. My voice getting louder and louder. He rolled his eyes. "Then go sleep under the Boardwalk! Maybe you wouldn't be such a brat!" He yelled. I shot an even deadlier glare his way. "Because it's cold and the sound of footsteps would never let me sleep!" I yelled. He looked shocked at my outburst. Realizing what I said, his eyes soften. "Sorry I just thought- " I pushed passed him to the room. I closed the door and locked it. I pushed myself on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

"Mother? If you can hear me, I never hated you. I always loved you. And I hope you and dad love me. I'm sorry but Julianne won't leave me alone. I know you know who she is.. She killed dad." Tears escaped my eyes and rolled past my ears to wet my hair. A hiccup forced itself through my lips and I wiped the tears away. "I know you hurt me, I know you know what you did. But I really need you now. I need you to be my mom, I need you to be here, you can't. But if you hear me-" I hiccuped again and let out a son. "Just try to be here." I sighed and closed my eyes. I heard a tapping sound and turned to the window. Through the dark night sky I saw a bird. I didn't scare it away, just stared. The tapping began to sound familiar.

It was morse code, Matt taught it to me just in case, we didn't exactly live in the safest part of town. I concentrated on the tapping to make it out.

I.. L.. O.. V.. E.. Y.. O.. U..

I gasped quietly not to scare the bird away. The bird began to sing a song. Why was it so familiar?

The melody was quiet and beautiful. It sang until there was soft knock at the door. Before the frightened bird flew away. The eyes flashed blue. A smile grew on my mouth and silent tears on joy streamed down my face again. I rolled over to face the ceiling again.

She heard me.

She really heard me.

She loves me.

I joyful laugh filled the room. I sighed and wiped the tears. The door knob began to jiggle and the lock twisted. Rylan barged through the door and looked around desperately. He looked at me and frowned in disgust. "Are you high?" He asked. Oh crap.. Yea.. My eyes are red but there are no tears and I'm smiling.. So yea.. "Oh! What? No.." I sniffed and wiped any remaining tears. He sighed in relief. "Okay good." He walked to me and sat down. "Look, I was an ass earlier.." He looked down. I saw a glint of guilt in his eyes. "It's okay.." Without that I wouldn't have talked to my mom I thought. "No it's not. I'm a jerk and it was wrong of me to think of you in that way. ccvccvjtrd.." The last part was muffled. "What?" He looked down and muffled his words again. "Enemsry.." He coughed and looked away from me. I knew what he was saying but I wanted him to say it clearly. I put my hand next to my ear and smiled. "I'm sorry what?" I asked. "I'm sorry." He said clearly. To clear the serious tension in the air I played with him. "I'm sorry what?" I asked again. He groaned playfully. "You look like a strawberry." He whispered to me like someone was gonna hear. I pushed him gently and laughed. "Am not!" I said with a childlike voice. He nudged me. "Nah. You're a cute strawberry." He said. My smile disappeared and my cheeks heated up. He looked at me and fell on the floor laughing. "Oh.. My.. Gosh.. You should've seen.. Your face!" He said in between laughed. I crossed my arms and pouted. "You jerk!" I yelled but he still laughed like he was having a heart attack. He finally stopped and looked at me again and continued another round of his laughing fits.