The Rules of Living with the Avengers

23. Do not go wedding dress shopping. It freaks men out.

"What are you ladies doing today?"

We- Natasha, me, Maria Hill and Jane Foster- turn round with a glare. Four male agents smirk at us. "We're going out," Jane says coldly.

"Where to?"

"Keep your nose out of our business lest I accidentally break it," Natasha growls. The men almost run away.

Jane waits until they're out of sight before sighing. "Phew. They almost had me there. I was cracking. I don't know how you guys do interrogation!"

She goes skipping ahead and I break out in infectious laughter.

...
We enter the shop, eyes wide with the beauty and the sparkles. "Ladies," a woman comes floating up to us, "can I help you?"

"Yes. We're the Foster-Odinson booking," Jane says. "We're here to try on wedding dresses."

...
Once we stagger home, holding bags of our favourite dresses (all on Tony's credit card), we all stare at each other. "What should we do with all these?" Natasha asks. "Clint will never stop teasing me if he finds out."

"Well if anyone from SHIELD finds out, my reputation will vanish. I won't be feared anymore," Maria sighs.

"I think Thor would love this," Jane says enthusiastically.

"Steve would freak," I groan as I get my pretty pretty vintage wedding dress out. "But it's so pretty."

"You said about a million times," Natasha rolls her eyes. "Should we just try them on again? Like how we would look if we had a wedding reception here and we were wearing them."

"Maybe..." Maria says. "When's everyone else home?"

"At seven," I tell her. "That gives us plenty of time..."

...
"Did you see the karate kick I did to that guy!" Clint yells. I jump as they all come into the living room. Natasha and Maria hide their faces into pillows but Jane just grins.

"Um..." Tony stares at us. "Are you-"

"Uh..wow," Loki smirks. "You all look ravishing. I'm a lucky man to know you all."

"Aw, thank you Lo-"

"Ellie!" Steve interrupts me with a frown. "What's happening here? Are you engaged? And who to?" He looks heartbroken.

"I'm not and if I was, it would be to you, Cap. I'm not cheating on you," I say. He looks relieved now but he's still frowning at me. Bruce and Tony exchange looks behind him then simultaneously dart to the elevator. Loki follows, humming some song.

Fury is smiling as he walks over to Maria. "Agent Hill?"

"Hi," she mutters. "Should we go back to the helicarrier?"

"I have a craving for a pizza. And I know the best pizza place in New York isn't far away," he says. Her eyes widen and she opens her mouth to speak. "Yes, it's a date, Agent. But I think today is going to be classified, don't you?"

"I...I can live with that," she grins and leaps up.

"Also please take that dress off," Fury says and Maria flushes but gives me a thumbs up as she walks past.

"Lady Jane, you look splendid, my love. Would you like to depart and make our way to my chambers to prove our enormous amount of love for one another?" Thor booms.

Jane face-palms as me and Natasha start laughing. "They know what that means, Thor," she groans but let's him take her arm. She winks at me and I mime being sick. I don't need to know what Thor and Jane get up to in their chambers.

Then it's just me, Nat, Hawk and Cap. "Um-" Natasha stands up and looks at Clint. "You tease me about this ever and I will tell everyone what happened in Budapest. Okay?"

"I'm a bit confused about what happened there. I've got a big blank space regarding that mission. I remember the plane rides there and back..." Clint frowns.

"You don't want that information getting out," Natasha says. "Now let's go do some target practice."

"I'm not going to be the target, am I?"

Natasha just winks and walks out. Clint follows, looking slightly worried. Steve turns to me with a sigh. "So, El," he starts.

"I don't want to get married," I say, sensing what this might be about. "My goals for now are finding out about Budapest and seeing Clint used as target practice."

Steve laughs, visibly relaxing, and kisses my cheek. "Would you care to join me in watching their training then, Miss Potts?"

"I would love to, Mr Rogers," I reply and kiss him back. We go into the elevator but before the doors close, I see a figure appearing, a green magical glow illuminating their sad and tired face.