The Rules of Living with the Avengers

13. Do not put truth serum in Fury's coffee

"Wake up, Ellie," someone gently shakes me awake. "We have a meeting with Fury in the helicarrier in ten minutes."

I open my eyes and look up at Bruce, who's whole face is full of concern. "What's wrong?" I sit up instantly. "Why do you look so worried? Is it one of the Avengers? Are they injured? Is it Pepper? Is it Coulson or Hill? Stop looking worried, Bruce!"

"It's you I'm worried about," he mutters but leaves before I can ask why. I skip out after I put some jeans and a Christmas jumper on and then hold onto the rope for the helicarrier without any trouble.

Once up there, Tony turns to me. "Meeting in two minutes. Don't be late."

"When am I ever late?" I roll my eyes and start to run towards my favourite lab. The scientist there is called Hank Pym and he always makes me things. He hands me the truth serum uneasily.

"Why did you want me to make it?"

"It's a secret," I say.

"Why?"

I start singing Jingle Bells and get to the meeting room in record time, only four minutes late. Fury looks up as I enter then starts the meeting. I sit at the front next to Steve, who blushes as I sit down, and casually reach for Fury's coffee. "Potts!" He yells.

I pretend to be defeated as I pour a few drops into the coffee. "Aw, I just wanted a drink," I lie.

"Here. I brought some spare water with me," Steve says and hands me a water bottle.

"Thanks, Cap," I say. Natasha looks extremely annoyed, although Clint looks like he's just found out that there's another Hunger Games book coming out, dedicated to him.

{that look is a cross between an excited fangirl and a tribute about to get killed}

"This meeting is very-" Fury pauses and chokes on his coffee. "This coffee tastes worse than Natasha's blueberry pie!" He exclaims then gulps.

"You said you loved that pie!" Natasha says, angrily.

"I didn't! It was horrible! Even Barton and Stark pretended they liked it! We are scared of you!"

"Damn right you should be scared of me!" Natasha grabs a pen off the table and then opens part of the wall up with it. "Be afraid," she hisses at Tony. "Be very afraid."

She disappears into the wall with a scowl and closes it behind her. Fury scowls at us all.

"Own up! Who put truth serum in my coffee?"

"Well, it wasn't me," Bruce says. "As if I would, Fury."

"I believe you, Bruce. You're the trustworthy one. Wait...POTTS!"

I glance at him innocently. "Yeah?"

"You poisoned my coffee!"

"Not poison, specifically, truth serum. And let the games begin!" I announce.

"The game is on!" Tony cheers. "I love Sherlock!"

"Fury, do you fancy Maria Hill?" I ask.

"Yes! Don't be ridiculous!" He shouts then realises what he's said and groans. "Please don't tell her..."

"Agent Hill, please come into the meeting room," Clint says into his earpiece with a smirk.

Fury looks confused. And angry. As usual. "We took the earpiece away from you, Barton. He kept reading us books when we were on missions. Hill-"

"Ooh."

"-was about to take down a gang leader we had been tracking for two years when Barton suddenly started reading out the chapter of Hunger Games 3 when Prim dies." Fury says. "It was very upsetting."

"It's not Hunger Games 3," I growl.

"It's Mockingjay!" Clint says.

Fury actually looks scared of us. "Okay...aha, Agent Hill, hello. I'm afraid that Agent Barton wasn't meant to summon you."

"Summon me?" Hill laughs. "I'm not a dog, Nick. Sorry, Director Fury."

Tony looks up and laughs. "I wish I could call you Nick. I think we've become friends. I didn't mean to say that. Potts!"

"What? None of this was me!" I protest. "It was just Fury's truth thing that was me! Oops."

Natasha and Coulson suddenly run into the room and she slams the door behind them. "There's been a security breach!" Natasha yells and locks the door. "Air pumped into the air vents. Barton, you try escaping through there to find the source and be a hero and I will personally follow you and drag you out. Don't care if I get infected." Natasha tells Clint. He stares at her.

"You sound like you actually care," he says.

"I do." She says and blushes. "Uh Hank Pym's truth serum has been released into this room in gas form. So while we are in here we will have to tell the truth."

"Oh shit," I mutter. "This was not my plan."

"Scared you might spill some secrets?" Tony smirks at me. "Maybe how you feel about a certain Avenger."

I go red. "I'm just not going to talk."

Tony leans back in his chair and looks at me. "That will be the day."