The Rules of Living with the Avengers

25. Don't have a huge date on Valentine's Day with all the Avengers

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Hope you've had a great time- with real people or fictional characters. I spent my day with Captain Jack Harkness- from Doctor Who! Doctor Who marathons are awesome!! Anyway, please read and enjoy and thank you all for over 3K reads!!!

"Good morning," I whisper into Steve's ear. He's sat at the kitchen counter, eating scrambled eggs. "Happy Valentine's Day, love."

"Happy Valentine's Day," he replies and kisses my cheek. Tony is sat in the sink. I don't even question things like that anymore.

"Pepper's coming home tonight." Tony tells me. "We're going on a date. She told me to ask if you two want to come."

"No we're all right-"

"That would be great," I say at the same time. We both look at each other and frown. "Cap, don't be rude."

"I'm not. I just thought that it's our first Valentine's Day. We could spend it alone."

"I'd like to spend it with the people I love," I scowl. Then I turn to Tony. "Why don't we invite Clint, Natasha, Bruce, Betty, Thor, Loki and Jane as well? And Bucky?"

"Sounds great." Tony says unenthusiastically. "I'll text Pepper now. Or later."

"Now." I demand. "Or you'll forget."

***
That night I'm getting ready when someone knocks on my bedroom door. "Who is it?" I call out as I put on my dress. It's blue and white floral and pretty and patriotic.

"Clint!"

"Have you come with make-up advice?"

"You're never going to let that go, are you?" He yells. "It was one time! By accident! I'm good at make-up. I've watched Nat put it on for years. I didn't mean to get that job! And I didn't think you'd be there."

I laugh and open the door. "What can I do for you, Hedwig?"

"I need advice-" he sees the smirk on my face "-about Natasha."

"Finally!" I say and hug him. I can't help but ingest a load of deodorant and almost choke. Jesus. Then I put on my matchmaking face (half-excited and half-concerned). "What about her?"

"Well..." Clint rubs his forehead. "Um, she's very pretty."

"Great. That's shocking. Shocking news, Hedwig. Maybe elaborate?" I roll my eyes.

"She's nice."

"Top marks here. You should write Valentine's Day cards."

"She's got red hair..."

"Oh, for Odin's sake," I sigh. "Do you want me to talk you up to her or what?"

"That would...that would be nice. Thanks, El."

"No problem." I say. "You owe me a favour though."

"Nothing that will threaten national security."

"Damn." I mutter. His mouth drops open and I chuckle. "Just kidding! Honestly!" He starts to walk out and I stop smiling. "Damn."

***
We're at a long table with six seats at both sides. Pepper is sat across from Tony and they've been arguing so they're both sat in silence; Bruce and Betty are saying long words that I can't understand so I guess they're both being science nerds together; Clint and Natasha are talking about a mission but Natasha keeps playing with the cute arrow necklace she has and Clint looks embarrassed and nervous; Thor is booming out comments about the menu and Jane is laughing at him, both happy; Bucky looks confused and Loki is looking grumpy.

Steve is trying to be nice to me. "You look beautiful, Ellie," he says. Then raises his glass of wine. "Shall we drink to that?"

I raise my glass and clink it against his. "We shall," I smile at him. From the other side of the table, Loki snorts.

I look at him but am distracted by Pepper. She's moodily stirring her soup whilst Tony chats to a waitress. No...chats up a waitress. Oh hell. "Stark?" I whisper loudly. "Stop-"

"Oh I don't mind, Ellie! I'm used to it!" Pepper says. Tony glares at her and the waitress hurries away.

"What's your problem? I love you!"

"Yeah. Course you do. You spend more time with Bruce. Locked away in that lab all day. Not letting anyone in! All Sunday!" Pepper tells Betty who suddenly looks murderous.

"Sunday? When you bailed on me because you told me that you were going to see a sick aunt?" Betty yells. Bruce groans as she glares at him.

Uh oh. This is disastrous. "Why did you lie to her?" Natasha snaps at Bruce. Clint puts his hand on her arm and smiles softly at her, "hey, Nat, let's stay out of this, okay?"

"Don't tell me what to do!" Natasha yells. Pepper has now thrown her drink at Tony and Betty has stood up.

"Let's go." Jane announces suddenly. Thor looks confused. "I'm not mad at you, honey, I'm mad at those guys."

"Lady Sif would resolve this by fighting. She is a most majestic fighter," Thor says.

Jane's face clouds over. "Okay. Now I am mad."

"Why? Lady Sif has nothing on you, Jane. Except she has better fighting skills. And a healthier appetite. And-"

By this time, Natasha, Jane, Pepper and Betty are gone. Steve looks at me anxiously. "Are you mad at me?"

"No. Why would I be?" I ask. Again Loki snorts and this time I scowl at him. "What?"

"Nothing, mortal," his lip curls into a smirk. "I just know some secrets about your Captain that would surprise you. And I can't lie because Stark injected me with some truth thing last night. He says it's so I can't make evil plans again. Like last week."

"Don't." Steve says hurriedly. I look at him and wonder what he's been up to. He's Captain freaking America, it can't have been anything too bad.

"Let me just say: 234 Carver Street. At 8pm last night. He came out of there, looking tousled, with his shirt buttoned up wrong," Loki says.

"Oh great!" I shout and stand up. "You're all liars now. And Loki, even though you told me the truth, you're no better. You didn't have to tell me in public! What about Bucky? Hey, Bucky, you got any secrets?" I say.

The assassin looks even more puzzled than Thor. "Um...I don't....Steve, do I have any secrets?" He asks.

My super soldier sighs and shakes his head. I glare at him. Not my super soldier. Someone else's super soldier. Evidently.

Ugh! I hate male superheroes sometimes! They're all worse than normal people! Give me an eighteen year old boy any day!