The Rules of Living with the Avengers

2. Dont do psychoanalysis tests on the helicarrier with the Avengers

I hurry up to the roof where the helicarrier is waiting, a few metres above. I look up at it as ropes drop down then stare at Tony. "I have to climb the rope? I can't."

"We're not climbing."

"Thank fu-"

"You just hold onto it and pulls you up. Don't let go though. That would be...bad. Mostly because Pepper would kill me if you splattered on the pavement from the helicarrier," he continues and I gulp.

"This outfit is not made for holding onto ropes." I tell him and Tony sighs.

"Can you please not talk about clothes or meeting future husbands and whatever else you like to do whilst we're with SHIELD?"

"I'm not that girly. I paint. And draw. And I did a self defence class once. And I run. I'm in the running team. I was in the high school running team, anyway. I'm not at that high school anymore." I trail off as I realise no-one's listening to me. Clint and Natasha grab a rope and they start the descent. Bruce and Thor are staying behind, I don't know why so they wave us off and go back inside. Steve wraps his legs around the rope and his shirt lifts slightly in the wind. I whistle at him and he blushes furiously.

Tony grabs a rope and swings it to me. "Here you go. Hold on."

"Fine," I pout and hold on, wrapping my legs around it. I suddenly shoot up, wind blowing in my face. I laugh as I reach the top and clamber onto the helicarrier.

Coulson helps me up and I bounce around the room, pressing buttons and annoying Tony as he tries to stop me. Then Fury walks in and I instantly stop because let's face it, he's scary. "Agent Romanoff, Agent Barton, Captain Rogers...Stark." His voice turns angrier as he lays eyes on my (almost) uncle. Tony waves at him. "And you...uh...Pepper's niece?"

"Ellie."

"I'm not going to remember that. Potts. Everyone report to the second interview room. Romanoff will lead the way. You're all having your psychoanalysis tests." Fury says.

"But I'm not even an Avenger, never mind an agent!" I protest.

"We need to make sure that you're not crazy and a threat before we welcome you aboard the ship, Potts. Now go!"

Clint drags me along the corridor as I start to complain even more and I fall silent. Agents stare at me but no-one my age. Shame. Finally we all enter the interview room and a man wearing glasses and a suit smiles at us all. "If we could analyse Miss Potts first, would that be convenient?" He says.

"N-"

"Yes." Tony shoves me in a chair and glares at me. "Play nice," he says threateningly.

"Looking after teenagers isn't your strong point, is it?" I smirk and they all leave apart from the man. A woman then enters and sits across from me, beside him. "Hey." I say.

"Good afternoon, Miss Potts. May I call you Ellie?" The woman says.

"Sure. Call me whatever you like."

"I'm Andrew and this is my associate Rebecca." I instantly register them as Specs and Blonde. "Ready to begin?"

"Can't wait," I reply dryly.

Blonde clears her throat and shuffles some papers. I roll my eyes and wait, impatiently, for her to begin. "Eleanor Potts, daughter of deceased Sara and John Potts. You have been living with your aunt, Rose Potts, your father's sister, for the last four years. Now you are living with Pepper Potts, your father's other sister, because of Rose going travelling."

"Thank you for telling me my family history. Now why do I have to do this?" I sigh.

"While Miss Pepper Potts is away, your guardian is Mr Tony Stark."

"God help us all."

"You think he's an unfit guardian?"

"His friends are a bit crazy. But in a good way. Like Agent Barton, Clint, forgot to wear pants this morning when I first met him. And Natasha made me cover it up. And I had pop-tarts with Thor and Bruce. Steve was chasing Tony because Tony let me know about Operation Frostbite-" I stop. "What are you writing down?"

"Nothing, ma'am, don't worry," Specs scribbles down something else. I lean over and glance at it.

"I was kidding. About all that. I'm... very... uh... imaginative?"

"Okay, Ellie, we believe you," Blonde winks. "Wouldn't want to rat out your friends."

"I was joking. I swear."

"Have you ever had a violent urge to physically harm anyone?"

"Apart from some annoying bitchy cheerleaders at my high school? Ha. No." I shake my head frantically. Specs writes something else down.

"To mentally harm anyone?" Blonde asks.

"No. I'm not a complete bi-did you just write down excessive swearing?" I glare at Specs. "I'm a teenager. Jesus."

"Sorry, ma'am." He says but smiles softly at Blonde. "Have you ever had sexual relations?"

My cheeks burn. "A bit private, isn't it? I'm not having you tell Fury about my sex life."

"That's a no then," Blonde whispers to Specs.

"I didn't say no!"

"It's my job to analyse people." She smiles coldly. I growl at her and she looks a bit anxious. Ha. Serves her right for being so aggravating. "Have you ever been in love?"

"I don't get it," I avoid her question. "Why all these personal questions? What can you gain from this?"

"Just answer the question, ma'am."

"I think the real question, Rebecca, is have you ever been in love?" I arch an eyebrow and she stares at me. "Don't like reverse-psychoanalysis do you?"

"Let me ask you, Ellie," she says, "how do you ever expect to achieve anything, any of you or the Avengers, when you're all so ridiculously damaged? You with whatever murky history you have and the attitude. The two agents with their histories and their disregard for orders. Stark with his showing off all the time-"

"Tony is a show off. Showing off is what they do." I say.

"And Captain Rogers with his obsession with that murderous assasin of a soldier who he thinks is a friend but Bucky Barnes will never be anything else than an idiot. An assassin. A weapon of HYDRA." Specs continues.

"You're really not smart are you?" I ask just as Steve comes hurtling through the metal door. He lands on Specs and punches him then hits him against the wall. Blonde stands up and squeals before Natasha strides in and headbutts her.

Tony helps me out of the ruined interview room and we walk along the corridor. "Should we tell Fury that the analysis went well?" I ask him and he laughs slightly.

"I don't think he'll believe us, chick. Last time Bruce HULKED out and smashed down the whole building, I melted down their cars and Clint poured birdseed on their houses." Tony says.

"Fun," I say as we turn the corner. Fury stares at us, his whole face stern and mad.

"STARK! POTTS!" He yells and I grimace. Aw. He caught us.