Still with you

Chapter 26 : Lie.

Chapter 26 : Lie.

This new explanation will take place in Anaheim, after our last North American concert. Tensions have been growing up between us, even though Jimin is smart enough to hide it from our brothers. He is a bit scared since his violent argument with Tae in Norway. I don't think our brothers really realize that. Anyway, everyone is tired, and there are lots of small skirmishes in the group.

After the last concert in the United States, I ask Jimin to join me in the hotel's gym room. Against all odds, he agrees. When he comes in I'm running on the treadmill, as I often do after a show. I stop the machine and grab a towel to wipe my neck. I sit on a bench a metre away from him. He stands still.

-You wanted to see me ? He starts.

-Yes. I would like to talk to you because there has been too much tension between us in the last few months.

It's so hard. I'm not good at that, but I have to. I have to keep asserting myself.

-It's okay, you dramatizes ...

-No, I don't think so. What's wrong with you, Jimin ? Why are you mad at me ?

-I'm not angry, I'm fine... he looks away, unable to stare at me any longer.

I grab his hand, and force him to turn to me.

-Tell me ! I don't understand anything !! Why are you punishing me ?

He tries to take his hand off, but I strength my grip.

-You're hurting me !!

-You're hurting me too ! What did I do to deserve this ??

Our voices are getting louder. It's not good. I'm sorry about it, but I want to know. That's enough now.

-Set me free ! You don't need me anyway !!

I am so surprised that I let his hand go and find, at first, nothing to say.

-... What are you talking about Jimin ? I do not understand I tell you, I say in a low voice.

He backs off, as if to leave, and says :

-Now that you have a girlfriend, I mean nothing more to you. You used to need me, but not anymore. You just used me, that's all.

My blood boils in a second. I jump up and join him in two steps.

-What ?? Are you sick ?? You kept pushing me away or teasing me up ! You said I had to meet a girl !! You should be happy for me !! And now you blame me !! What the hell is your problem ???!

-My problem is you ! he wispers between his teeth, his neck outstretched towards me.

I back off all of a sudden, like a boxer in the ropes. All my anger has faded.

-What ? I manage to articulate.

-I try my best, Jungkook, but I can't no more, I'm sorry.

He looks defeated, indeed. He bravely supports my gaze, but the edge of his eyes is red, and his chin trembles. What's going on ? He suddenly looks so sad.

-Tell me, I say softly.

-I miss you...

-But I'm here Jimin, we're still together, we're friends. We have to support each other. You're the one who's pushing me away.

-Kiss me Jungkook...

-Jimin...

My voice is tired, I blame myself but he really tires me. We don't understand each other, despite our friendship.