Still with you

Chapter 23 : Forever rain.

Jungkook's story : Still with you.

Chapter 23 : Forever Rain.

This new argument intrigues me for several days, without me being able to ask for explanations. Anyway, we go on on a week of fan meetings in Japan. So I do not really have time for that.

I love more and more to meet our fans. It's really an opportunity to be closer to them. We can talk to them, even if I am not very good at it. We play games, we sing, we dress up, we show other sides of our personalities. It's really fun and it's also much less stressful than a concert. We visit Tokyo, Nagoya, Osaka and Fukuoka. The venues are full each time. Fans are so excited, it's so comforting. Japanese market is very important for us of course.

So we have a very good time. Good vibes are back in the group. Yoongi and Hoseok sing Otsukare Samadeshita, this catchy and funny Japanese song. Nam Joon and Jin have complicit glances at each other. Tae and Jimin are friends again, but Jimin still acts weirdly with me. I don't want to face him, so never mind. He dyed his hair blond. For me, this color suits him best. Armys are crazy about him.

To finish this year 2016, we win a daesang at the MelOn Music Awards ceremony, in Korea. It's a great musical award : Album of the Year for The Most Beautiful Moment in Life : Young Forever.

Sometimes it scares me. We have been waiting for succes for so long. But now it seems to fall on us like a hurricane. It shakes, we try to hold on, it's often fun, but it's difficult too. I know that even my older brothers are upset by everything that happens to us. This is a topic that often comes up during meals.

One night, after dinner, I realize that Tae is in a very bad mood. We talked about haters who still want to see us down, although I think Nam Joon doesn't tell us everything. For Tae, it may be more difficult because his emotions are very strong. I feel like I've managed to build a small shell to protect myself. I know it is not very strong yet, but it exists. Tae has none. It hurts my heart. I suggest that we play video games in my room because it is not that late. Nam Joon goes for a ride with Jin, as often. Yoongi's going back to his studio. Jimin and Hoseok are going to watch a movie in their room.

So we play a little, but he isn't doing better. He seems so weak, so sad. After I win the second round, I decide to stop this massacre. I try to get him to talk to me, maybe that will be enough to help him. Tae feels overwhelmed by everything that happens to us, by his drama...

Of course, he understand that we are lucky to do what we love, but pressure that comes with it is difficult to bear. And then he worries that everything can stop all of a sudden. I don't want to think about it because it terrifies me, too. Tae sobs in my arms, like often lately. Especially since his grandmother died. I gently rub his hair, but nothing helps. So I lean more on him to kiss his beautiful lips. He first kisses me back. I realize he probably needed it. Indeed, he relaxes and comes closer to me. But after a few moments, he gently pushes me away.

-Stop, we mustn'tdo it Jungkook...

-What ? Why ? Don't you like it ?

He straightens up and arranges his shirt, his eyes down.

-No ! Yes !... It's Jimin...

I feel like something's definitely wrong.

-What Jimin ? What are you talking about ? You'd rather kiss him, right ?

I'm getting angry, I know that, but I'm really struggling to stay calm.

-No... But he said we have to stop. He said ... that you're too young.