T.H.E. L.E.G.E.N.D.S. O.F. P.O.T.T.E.R.Z.O.N.E.

Why You Flirtin' With Me?

Sharvee's POV

I immediately landed on the ground, though fortunately landed on Alex and was cushioned by her body. 'I thought this would be more fun,' I groaned. 'Life ain't fair, kid. Now come on,' Rick said. 'Hey! Can we get something to eat? I'm hungry,' I said, as I got up from Alex's body. 'No. We can go to Shoney's after we kill the Poopers,' declared Rick. 'Fair enough,' said Chen.

'Now, where are they?' Daisy asked. 'Hiding in the White House,' he said, rolling his eyes. 'They're fucking everywhere! Shoot them or-or cast some spells on them, j-just kill them and make sure they can't come back to life,'

   'Our task is gonna be a lot easier though, we can use the Unforgivable Curses and get out of here in a snap.' I said, relieved. 'W-what are the Unforgivable Curses?' Questioned Morty. 'They're uh, curses which we aren't allowed to use at any cost on a human being. If you do, you've earned yourself a lifetime of enjoyment in Azkaban, the wizard prison with the Dementors, the floaty ghosts with cloaks who like to kiss you and suck out your soul,' Alex explained. 'And you being kids, can perform them?' Rick asked, both horrified and perplexed. I smirked. 'Well, we are one of the most powerful kids in the school. And we're somewhat intelligent too so that's that,'

   Morty looked terrified at my statement. 'You m-mean you can kill us if you want?' Daisy smiled. 'Yes, if you get very irritating, we can. But we don't waste our energy in killing people who're intelligent- like us. We like the company of Muggles from time to time, you know,' Rick looked smug at that statement.

'Okay, the writer is just stalling now. Let's make her make a Death Pooper appear so we can kill him and bond over that,' said Rick. As soon as he said that, a person in a- wait what? That looked like a person wearing a fucking poop emoji. Was that a joke or were they serious in wearing these? They looked like they were trick or treating in summer. But if they were getting candy on how awesome their costumes were, they'd probably get the candy stolen from them.

'Oh shit there he is! This one's mine,' he said and he shot that Death Pooper in the head. 'And this is for kidnapping my daughter,' he said angrily and shot his crotch. 'What the fuck, Rick? You could've just shot him once!' I said.

   'Being a sociopath has its advantages,' he grunted. He then turned to face us. 'Okay, so we're gonna split up. Sharvee, Chen, with me. Alex, Daisy, Morty, you go and kill the Death Poopers. I'll kill you if you die, Morty. Be safe you a-asshole. And we go to- what's it called? The Citadel of Magic. That's their HQ. Fucking ripoffs,' he muttered under his breath.

   Morty, Daisy and Alex ran off, and I nodded to Daisy to signal that it was gonna be alright. 'See you later and be safe,' I mouthed and she gave me a smile and a nod and ran off with Alex and Morty, who were shooting some Death Poopers as they ran in the search of more.

'Okay, so you know where your M-ministry of Magic and shit is?' Asked Rick. 'Duh,' I said.

'The Poopers mentioned that it was previously called that, but they overpowered it and now its run completely by those shitheads, so now we have to go there,' he said in a monotone voice. 'But wait, what happened to the MACUSA?' Chen asked. 'The what?' Rick asked, confused. 'MACUSA. American magic government.' I said. 'They don't exist,' he said blankly. 'They do! In our reality they do,' I said, sad that we had no reinforcements. 'Well, it probably does exist and the author is making the plot convenient, or it r-really doesn't exist. I'll go with the latter,' said Rick, bored. 'Okay, so can anyone magically transport us?'

'Oh great. We're stuck in Britain. Again,' said Rick. 'Well, you're dealing with British people, and their HQ is in Britain, so shut it,' I said as we stopped before the building which was previously the Ministry Of Magic. It had a depressing but neat look to it, like a school which was strict and had the worst teachers who didn't teach anyone anything. 'Well, so we just kill everyone inside and then get Summer and Beth out? Nothing else?' I asked a little sadly. You don't get to travel alternate universes and do shit which would have consequences everyday without getting off the hook. 'Yes, unfortunately.' Grumbled Rick. 'Why is everything...quiet?' Chen wondered. 'Time to find out,' said Rick and without warning, kicked open the heavy doors of the entrance of the HQ. He was surprisingly strong for an old guy. As I had suspected, the HQ was empty; there was no one in sight. Everyone had probably gone to fight. I started looking around for any signs of the Death Poopers or anyone who wished to kill us. Fortunately, a quick patrol told us there was no one. 'Good news! No Death Pooper in sight,' 'Good for us, bad for Morty, Daisy and Alex. We have to get Summer and Beth and get the fuck out of here to help those three,'