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"Don't let your loyalty become slavery

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"Don't let your loyalty become slavery.
If they don't appreciate what you bring to the table, let them eat alone."

Me and Khalil had a very emotional session that brought out many— if not all of the skeletons in my closet.

"Whether you just got married or you're celebrating your 50th anniversary, there will always be room to improve your relationship with your spouse

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"Whether you just got married or you're celebrating your 50th anniversary, there will always be room to improve your relationship with your spouse. I know there is something that shes does that bothers you, you see she didn't hesitate." Dr. Brown said urging Khalil to say what he needed to say.

He looked at me sympathetically before he opened his mouth to talk. 

"Listen Arielle," He hesitated before Dr. Brown nodded approvingly. "I'm not trying to belittle your feelings when I say this at all," He said before continuing, "I try to cater to your needs but you never sit and ask me am I good or how I'm feeling. You seem to forget that I have feelings just like you just because I don't have a mental disorder labeled to mine. I'm not saying that your mental state doesn't play a part in that, I'm just saying that I need love too basically," He chuckled, "Shit hit the fan when you had Sayori and had to stop taking your medicines— then you had Lathan and experienced postpartum for years at a time. You shut me out and pushed me away and I had to deal with that alone." He started to choke up.

"You having depression already, then dealing with postpartum on top of that really caused a drift between us and it was hard for you of course but the shit was ten times harder for me because I tried my best to be so strong for us both and our kids but it's like you ignored me entirely. And I'm not saying that it's your fault but I was struggling to be okay and be strong for you and our kids because while I was there completely, you were halfway in and halfway in another world mentally."

I blinked back tears as I was reminded of my past. I wanted to get under a cover and hide out of embarrassment and shame, but, I had to face the music  just like he did. I wasn't innocent and I definitely had flaws. I wasn't perfect.

"I didn't feel like a good husband and I tried to do both my part and yours but I got tired and I felt like I was losing myself trying not to lose you." He said as his eyes watered.

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