For the Emperor

Chapter 18

Did someone say double upload? OOOhhh

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Two large arms wrapped around you as you entered the chambers, a peaceful sigh leaving the mask as you lent on him. "So, what did you want to know my love?" your hands reached around, unclipping his mask as Kylo bowed his head to let you remove it. 

"So, so many things love. You really are a mystery to me." He spun you around so your faces met, a smile forming as your hand touched his cheek. 

"How about we get changed into something more comfortable, and I'll tell you as much as I can." You nodded and walked into the bedroom, unzipping your dress and letting it fall to the floor. Kylo watched from the doorway as you removed the last pieces of clothing before climbing into bed, his eyes locking on your chest as you turned around. 

"Pervert." You giggled and climbed under the covers. He chuckled and undressed himself, climbing into bed next to you and allowing you settle into his side.

"So, why do you wear the mask?" you tilted your head to look up at him, smiling and rubbing circles on his chest. He sighed and looked at you. 

"Really start with the hard stuff, don't you?" A breathy chuckle left his lips as he shook his head. "Well, I wasn't always like this..." you watched as his expression changed. When you first joined the First Order, you had heard rumours whispered amongst staff about where Kylo Ren had come from, but never had you known what was the truth. 

As you became close, his past didn't concern you; you were too consumed with the present and what the future could hold for you both. "My mask hides who I once was. My history serves no purpose to what I hope to achieve and so I forged a new identity. You're the only person who sees the man beneath, truly. Sure, I allow some men to see my face. But that doesn't mean they really see me." You smiled, feeling blessed that he feels comfortable enough to share such a personal side of him. "I feel like respect comes from the mask, you know? It makes people scared, makes them fear the unknown. Maybe people catch a glimpse at events, or when I'm training sometimes but mostly, I am an anomaly, to all except you."

"It also reminds me of my grandfather... of what he did and who he was. He was the only family member I connected to, and I never even met him... The power he had, well, that the stories say he had. Its all I've ever wanted. He made me who I am, without even knowing me. What I'd give to know what he thinks of me... of what I've achieved in his name." Your brow furrowed, but the look on his face told you not to question him any further. Deciding to change the subject, you rested your hand against his chest and looked up. 

"So, what was it that had you so zoned out by the fountain? It's not like you to disappear into thought." You sat up, slinging one leg over him to sit on his waist. His hands rested on your thighs as he looked up at you. 

"I was thinking about you, my beautiful bride to be. As I am every second of the day." You mirrored his smile and placed a light kiss on his forehead. "I was thinking about your strength. How you're growing and where this will take you. It reminds me of how I grew to know the dark side; the way it took over my being and gave me the strength I wield today." Your head tilted, watching him as his smile was replaced with a look of concern. His hands landed on your hips, thumbs drawing shapes against your skin. "I just want you to be safe that's all, I want to look after you and I want to know your powers are controllable." You nod and lay down, chin resting on his chest and hands reaching for his hair. Your fingers curled the black locks as Kylo placed kisses on your cheeks. "What flows within you is very strong, very sinister. It is the same energy I see in myself. I just don't want you to fall victim to it. We must work together, my love. Must keep you strong, but keep you. Because your light, your beauty... The way you see the world and everything in it. I can't lose that, because it's what keeps me going." 

"How did you do it? How did you learn to control it?" Kylo's brow furrowed as he thought, eyes closing for a moment as you watched him. 

"I'm not quite sure I have learnt, my darling. Sometimes, things can get overwhelming and you feel yourself slipping away. Having you, right by my side, grounds me and reminds me there's someone who needs me. That I can't let the darkness consume me because I have someone to love and to watch over." You smiled, stroking your thumb over his cheek as his eyes shone up at you. 

"I'll always be waiting for you Kylo... always be there to keep you with me. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you again. I don' think life would be worth living if its not holding you close and being able to love you." His hands on your hips pulled you closer, smile growing as you spoke. 

"You, my beautiful little one, are the greatest gift life could have ever given me. Never have I felt loved, or appreciated. Never have I needed to depend on someone else for happiness or pride. Until you came along. Now, I know no happiness unless you are there. I feel no joy or no pride unless you share it with me. The suns and the moons have no baring on me, because my being revolves around your existence." 

You blushed. Heart racing as each sentence touched your soul. You gently kissed him, smiling against his lips. One hand reached up and cupped your face, whilst the hand on your hip moved to your lower back. The kiss was tender and sweet; your name rolling from his tongue as you broke apart. "I will always look after you, my darling... always."