bare [h.s.]

Bruised

I can't cover them.
Them; the bruises that decorate the drained, nearly colorless
skin below.
No amount of makeup could
hide the ugliness that
the blue hues create.
I dip three fingers into foundation,
rubbing circles around the outlines of the disfigured markings,
adding more dabs of tan
to fill them in fully.
I reluctantly gaze up at the girl
reflecting back at me;
how hideous she is.
Blackened circles set
underneath her dimmed eyes.
She didn't sleep a wink
the night before;
her mind replaying the scene
that she tried so hard to erase.
And the hateful wounds haunt her,
they tell the story of her moment
of weakness; vulnerability.
But her heart ignores those bruises; reminds her that this love is better than none at all.
Her mind agrees,
she would never survive herself
if in the end,
she was alone.

"Sawyer, honey," my mother calls,
and my eyes dart to the locked door that separates us.
I watch the doorknob turn,
unsuccessful in opening.
"Why is this door locked?"

"Just a minute," I say, my voice
cracking under pressure.
I glare at the bruises that adorn
my neck, grazing my collarbone.
Next, I peer down at my wrists,
his harsh grip still lingering.
Hurriedly, I cover my neck the best I can with few strands of hair.
The sleeves of my shirt I tug
firmly down to shield my wrists.

"Is everything okay?" She asks
when I casually appear in front of
her, hoping her wandering eyes
don't inspect my body.

"Yeah, just didn't sleep well,"
I sadly smile, nervously tapping
my fingernails against
the wooden door.

"Breakfast is ready," she lowers her eyes, a hint of suspicion in her tone.
"Oh, and Ally will be joining us."

"Perfect," I say through clenched teeth as she nods evenly, motioning for me to follow
her down the steps.
My breath hitches in my throat
as Ally sits patiently at the dining table, her clear eyes meeting mine.

"Good morning," Ally sends a
friendly smile at me, and I nod,
taking a seat across from her.

"Where's Dad?" I ask, peeling
my gaze away from Ally.
My mother hovers over the stove,
the crackling sound of cooked
eggs gaining her attention.
She slides two plates in front of us,
taking pride in her cooking ability.

"He took Zach to baseball practice," she says, sitting at the end of the table and rolling her shoulders back into a
proper posture.
"I thought we could
have a girl's day."

I choke down my egg,
narrowing my eyes at my hands,
"I don't know."

"Chew next time, yeah?" Ally jokes, raising her brow at me.

"You're being disrespectful, Sawyer. If your mother and friend want to spend time with you,
you politely oblige."
I scoot the plate away with one
hand, making sure not to let
my sleeve creep up my arm.

"May I be excused?" I ask,
daring not to look at either woman.

"No, you may not--" she says,
but I disobey, standing
from the chair.

"Ally, come on," I instruct,
turning my back on my mother.
I hear Ally sigh, mumbling her
apologizes before following.

"What the hell is your problem?"
Ally asks once we reach my bedroom. I slam the door loudly,
warning my mother of
my irritability.

"Why are you here?" I sit down
at the edge of my bed, the egg threatening to surface again.

"Can't I visit my best friend?" She
says defensively.

"Are you going to lecture me about Harry? How I ruined a relationship? Anything?"

She laughs,
resting her hands on her hips.
She studies me closely, shaking
her head at the pathetic sight.
"Why would I? You seem
to know what you've done."

"Is Lauren destroyed?" I whisper,
scooting over slightly so Ally
can sit beside me.

"Destroyed? No.
Does she loathe you? Yes,"
Ally says, and I can't tell if
she's kidding or not.
I decide not to ask.
"But Harry and Lauren do this.
They break up, make up,
and Lauren has cheated plenty of
times on that poor boy.
I guess it was Harry's turn."

"He said he loved me," I mumble,
peering up at her frowning face.

"Harry? Harry said he loved you?"
She scoffs, a deep frown
hardening her features.

"Is it that hard to believe?"
I furrow my brows,
annoyed by her attitude.

"I suppose not," she thinks for
a moment, remembering a key point. "Aren't you dating Evan?"

"Elijah," I correct her,
my heart pounding in response
to the mention of his name.
Flashes of the day before
fill my thoughts, and I play
with my sleeves, sensing the
blotches of hurt under them.

"Right, him," she nudges me,
noticing the sadness that is prominently set in my expression.
"Do you feel the same for Harry?"

I don't speak for a few passing moments, trying to visualize Harry:
his hair that is ungodly long;
his eyes that are beautifully green,
they reflect the calming ocean
after a storm.
And then I picture him smiling
through our kiss, his painfully
slow breaths fanning across
my flushed cheeks.

"Yes," I say,
"I am undeniably,
most certainly,
completely and utterly
in love with him."

I can feel Ally smiling beside me,
and she sets her hand atop mine.
"What are you waiting for?"

"I have no idea," I confess,
my hand brushing against
my collarbone, below where
the hidden bruises lay.
Ally pushes herself from the bed,
carefully walking around the room.

"You have to tell him tonight."

"What's tonight?" I ask,
and she stares at me like
I have just grown three heads.
A smile spreads across her lips
and she excitedly dances
around where I sit.

"What's tonight?
Why, it's only the best thing ever. Harry's house party!"

/////////////////////

friends, hello.
there is a "bare" playlist that the lovely x17Black has created on 8tracks, and on it are some songs that relate to this story.
(It's really good like wowza)

here's the link:
http://m.8tracks.com/haroldsthunthun/bare

and if you're too lazy to put in the link (like me tbh), her username
on 8tracks is:
haroldsthunthun

go have a listen!

P.S. these ((probably 2 ?¿)) upcoming chapters involving the party are probably my fave so get ready.

P.P.S. thank you for commenting, voting, reading, and being wonderful.