Villain, D. Malfoy

21. Universal Contradictions

Emerald

I came into this thinking it was going to be simple. I made a promise to my mother, assuming that all of her plan's outcomes wouldn't have left any emotional attachments for me.

Yet, here I am, reliving every minute of that kiss. The way his hand clenched my face protectively, the way he pulled back to see if I was alright with it, and most of all: the way no oblivion spell could ever make me neglect that damn kiss.

Luna kept gossiping about how in Potions, Crabbe and Goyle were called out for borrowing the wrong mixture, but truthfully, I couldn't listen. No matter how hard I tried.

My mind kept going back to the same thought: What if this kiss destroyed everything? Someone like Draco could never be glimpsed with someone like me.

What will my mother think if she doesn't hear the justification from me directly? And his father, what would he reckon? My mother would disown me if she felt that I was doing this out of my emotions and not because I needed to fulfill her plan.

I bit my lip back, lowering my head down to gape at the Great Hall table instead of up to Luna's eyes. "Hey, I'm a bit tired; I apologize." I lied just in case she was about to ask me if I was okay. There's nothing I wouldn't say I like more on this Earth than lying.

Luna being as sympathetic as she always was, answered back with a comforting answer. Yet, my feelings blocked out all external noise, so I could only listen to my thoughts.

My eyes bucked up, and I caught Draco chuckling with his Slytherin friends. As soon as his eyes met mine, I shortly glanced back at Luna.

•

Draco

I always obeyed my father's orders. I just never thought one of them would've led me to unearth sensations for another person along the way. I'm one step closer to executing his plan now, but taking satisfaction in this step was never a part of the deal.

It's been four days. Four days is more than enough duration to forget about someone or any shared circumstances with them. I guess our case was the exception; because Emerald's lips and their aftermaths lingered on my mind the same way my hands didn't escape her waist the night of the Yule Ball.

"We can't do this." She mumbled as I took the seat next to her in the Muggle Studies class before anyone else did. She shut her eyes and looked away for a moment before twirling her head towards my gape.

"Do what?" I asked, but I knew exactly what her answer was going to be.

"Be us."

"No one can ever find out about that kiss," I murmured, glimpsing around the room, making sure no one was near enough to listen in our conversation that could not wait any longer.

"I'm on the same page as you are. So, what now?" She licked her lips. A part of me needed her to admit that she wanted to fight for us. Or whatever we were, if there even was an us.

"What now?" I shrugged, tugging on my bottom lip.

"We go back to arguing and loathing each other in public. That was never boring. We just can't let people know about us."

I allow my actual feelings to creep out of my throat this time. My friendship with Emerald had always been complicated, but one thing she taught me was that one should always be assertive with the things you wish in life.

"But what if I want to kiss you again?" My skin got too close to hers, and I had to halt myself from doing anything in public.

"Draco." Her hollowed cheeks deterred me from seeing her face altogether.

"I want to kiss you again. Even if it's a sin, and even if it needs to be a secret."

She finally turned her body towards mine. "Look, I don't know what this is. And I don't expect us to figure it out. And I don't know what I mean to you or what you mean to me. But what I am sure of is that preposterous kiss won't abandon my mind. It haunts me relentlessly. So, if we were to do anything, it would need to be in secret. Are you in or are you out?" Her minimal eye contact let me know this has been distressing her for as long as it's been tormenting me.

Sometimes the most messed up trick the Universe will play on you is its timing. Timing is an intractable boundary that can stand in the way of people's wants and desires.

But why do we have to be vulnerable to the Universes' endeavors at breaking two people together? You can always say yes and strive to fight back. And so that's what we did. Or at least, what I did.

"I'm in." For the first time in my life, I had replied without hesitation.

And there she sat, with her ludicrous smile I first saw in Potions last semester, that reminded me that all of this was going to be worth it.