Villain, D. Malfoy

42. Tell Her I'm Sorry

Draco:

I didn't mean to kill her.

Emerald's arms grasped my torso as mine embraced her shoulders. She couldn't cry anymore; she was just in complete shock. All of this felt... fake, fictional, like a fever dream or a disastrous nightmare.

The thoughts of murdering Pansy and Ambrose fumed my head without me granting them access, but then as Emerald stood in front of me, I remembered she was my major priority.

"Talk to me," I mumbled, but she didn't move her head from my chest. "Hey," I pulled away and cupped her cheeks, "Talk," I demanded, but not in a harsh way. In a pale voice.

The corners of her eyes were narrowly red, her lashes thick with water, and the top of her lip red and puffy. Even weeping, her features were unbelievable. "I just- I can't believe it, you know? One minute we were chatting before going to bed, and the next..."

I grabbed her back into my chest, cradling her head. "I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I never meant for this to happen." I kept muttering.

I didn't mean to kill Luna. Well, my hands didn't possess her blood; Ambrose and Pansy's did. But, God, it was my fault. If they had never been in my life, none of this would have happened.

I want to destroy them. They just shattered the most whole and the purest thing I've ever owned. I want to destroy them and wipe those ridiculous smiles off their faces. At least they were expelled from Hogwarts; that solves part of something. But still, it doesn't alter what happened.

Emerald didn't have that many friends. I mean, every one appreciated her. She was that type of person that no one could ever loathe. I once disliked her because I was told to. But once I discovered that very soul of gold she has, I learned I couldn't go back to despising her.

Everyone at Hogwarts liked her. But everyone was also after her. My father is one of them, as she was the heir of Ravenclaw. The only heir of the Hogwart's houses left standing, except for Slytherin, of course, which was me.

The one person that never fled her side was Luna Lovegood. She was the sole friend that looked after her as if they were sisters. Of course, I came to care for Emerald as if she was mine, which she is now, but it took me months to concede my feelings. Luna, however, had her back since day one. Since the day I met Emerald face to face about her being ignorant in Potions class. God, I recall that day...

"Are you serious? Potions is probably my worst class. Trust me; if my house didn't end up in flames, it was a success." Emerald chuckled as she and Luna halted in front of the classroom.

"Like you've ever taken the class before." She heard me growl behind her. She stopped dead in her tracks as she recognized whose voice belonged to.

"And how would you know this piece of information?" She paused.

Everyone else stood back to see her and I's minor clash in the middle of the hall. My powerful stare overlooked hers. "Please, it's crazy how foolish of a wizard you seem to be. Let me guess; you assumably don't even know what Wingardium Leviosa means."

"Expelliarmus!" She shouted, making my books fall out of my hands. I remember licking my lips, sarcastically smiling, walking closer over to her. "Sectumsempra has a fine ring to it, doesn't it?" I was towering over her at this point.

"Oh, wouldn't it just look so good next to your name? Now, get out of my face." She stormed off before I could snatch her arm, and she strolled into Potions with Luna.

I sigh, coming back to reality, to the girl who kept clasping onto my chest, accidentally moistening it with salty tears. I heard her sob once or twice. Each one felt like plummeting a knife into my stomach. I scorned the noise of her sobbing.

"Can I go up to your dorm? I don't think I want to" She eventually faced me voluntarily, and I responded, immediately knowing what she was about to say before she had to say it.

"Let's go." I pulled her waist.

She didn't want to go back to her and Luna's dorm. She couldn't. She's a powerful woman, but no person that strong can sleep in a room right after the other habitant has passed away. It's vile, disgusting, and betrayal-like almost.

I dropped her off in my dormitory, knowing she wanted to be alone. It's unusual; I know what she feels when she doesn't have to tell me anything about it. I know what she thinks, and I know what her spirit wants.

"I'll be back. If you need me, you know where to find me." I referred to her left wrist as I grabbed her hand, and instantly she knew what I was talking about; the Astronomy Tower, where I once told her I learned her wrist had twenty-four freckles.

I felt like shrieking once I reached the elevated building. I pondered how high the jump was by my casual looks and leaned over the metal railing. I imagined what it would feel like, just jumping down the forty feet drop.

She's like this because of your fucking fault, Draco.

You destroyed her.

You cost her her best friend.

It's her body on your hands. Not Pansy's, not Ambrose's.

She doesn't deserve my repercussions.

It's you. It's always fucking you.

Why do you wreck every single thing you touch? You thought this time would be different?

Don't feel guilty, because it's your fault again.

You shouldn't be so stunned knowing you made another human cry over your actions.

When will you fucking stop?

As if my soul could bleed a sea through my eyes, that was the beginning of my sobbing. "Tell her I'm sorry." If there's a God or there's a sign, I scream and beg for them to deliver my message. Because I don't think I can anymore.