Life changing moments

Chapter 38- skype

So since Brad and I had our first date I hadn't heard from him that much and when I did I started the conversations and keep it going and he would have to go or something. I know we weren't dating officially or anything but you would think after all we have been through so far. I decided to log onto twitter and see if he has been on line recently. I went onto his profile and noticed a lot of fans talking about the can we dance video coming out shortly. What ? he didn't tell me anything. Ugh did I do something. Speaking of the devil. I got a text from Brad

Brad my bae :

Hey do you want to do something tomorrow?xx

Ok maybe I was over thinking everything its just lisa went on her date with Tristan they have been together everyday and me and brad haven't seen each other once. I replied

Me: Sure what you wanna do? xxxx

Brad my bae:

Wanna go to the cinema at 4 xxx

Me: ok see you there

I think this was a sign that everything is ok I mean it takes a couple of days to shoot a music video and he probably hadn't a lot of time.

I decided to call my mom and dad on skype I really missed them especially when I was home alone and during the summer. Like they wont be here for my graduation from school in 2 weeks so I guess I will just go with Lisa and they aren't going to be here when and if I get accepted to collage and prom even tho I really don't want to go but that's in 2 months time. I went into the kitchen and set up my laptop. It rang and rang and rang typical too busy for their only daughter that they haven't seen in 4 months. I don't know why but this time it hit me harder then usual I put on my runners and grabbed my phone and decided to go for a walk in the nice weather. I walked to the park and just lay on the grass watching the clouds move. I kept thinking bad thoughts like why am I here and my parents don't love me. I realised I had more pain inside me then I thought. I looked at my phone to see it was 8pm already.

I decided to go home and just go to bed early. I got home and went into the bathroom to take off my makeup. I went into the cupboard to get some makeup remover when I saw the silver blade lying there. I used all my will power not to pick it up but I did, I scrapped it off my wrist and once was enough to make the pain go away. I went into bed and went to sleep.