A Soulmate's Love

Chapter 15 - Flipping the Switch

WARNING: SEXUAL ASSAULT & VIOLENCE- NOT rape

Also, this chapter is very long but it sheds a lot of light on the struggles many faces with anxiety and you will learn a little more about the characters.

It's a VERY important chapter.

At dinner I couldn't bring myself to eat, ignoring El's pleading. I wanted to cry, I wanted to give up and just crawl into a hole and never be found. I could feel my heart rate climbing, and my hands began to shake. Recognizing the signs of an anxiety attack, I calmly left the Entrance Hall, trying my best to not bring any attention to myself.

As soon as I got to the library I found a corner and tried my best to not let the attack consume me. I couldn't breathe. My vision was dimming with the lack of oxygen, and I waited for this horrible moment to end. I tried counting, staying in control of the situation, following the steps I had learned, but I just couldn't.

Suddenly I felt that familiar touch, and I silently swore to myself. He couldn't see me like this, no one could. I looked up to make sure it was him, though I already knew it was. I calmed slightly at the blurry sight of him; his red hair delicately framing his face, his hazel eyes looking intently at me.

I took a breath in and kept my face as neutral as possible. I looked back up at him looking at me with a concerned look in his eyes and got up. I spoke as monotone as I could and left for the Ravenclaw common room.

As soon as I got there, Elise was waiting on my bed. I looked at her and she understood quickly. We had a silent agreement, that after an attack on either of our sides, we would just continue and pretend like it never happened.

"Pride and Prejudice or 10 things I hate about you?" She proposed. Those were our two favorite movies, and it always depended on our mood.

"10 things," I sighed, and she nodded happily. We put the movie on and snuggled up under the covers of my bed, her leaning her head in my neck and my head on hers. I must've dozed off for when I woke up the movie was almost done.

"Okay! It's time for your date!" Elise said excitedly, getting up to look through my closet. I got up as well, looking through hers. We shared almost all of our clothes and most of the time I was wearing her shoes with my pants and her top.

"So, El I want to go for that casual look you know? Like I'm not trying too hard, I just woke up like this."

"Definitely, how about this?" She asked picking out a few things. It was a black pleated skirt, a black top with lace at the borders, and a grey sweatshirt. "So, you'll be warm, and cute!"

"Love it thanks El!" I said, taking the clothes in my arms. "Hey, do you want to get ready with Ro and Ange in the Gryffindor common room? Roya is really good at makeup and she can do mine." I proposed. I loved spending time with the Gryffindor girls and they would help with tips.

"Good idea, I'm hopeless at makeup," Elise said with a sigh. We quickly walked to the red and gold house without running into anyone because they were all getting ready for bed. We gave the password to the fat lady and passed by the lounge area.

"Hey, Hermione!" I said to the frizzy-haired girl sitting with Harry and Ron. We had become good friends and I found out that she was really nice and a good friend outside of her smarts.

"Hey, Theia! Are you going to Roya and Angelina's dorm?" She asked, rubbing her eyes and yawning.

"Yeah, they're going to help me get ready! Do you want to come?" I asked knowing that the girl didn't have many female friends. She spent almost all of her time with Harry, Ron, and Neville.