STAY WITH US (BTSxreader)

Chapter 50: Falling shattered

Trigger warning: mentions of depression, self-harm and suicide. 

Sorry guys, this is going to be a heavy one.

There will be another trigger warning when things get really bad.

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"Y/n-ie? you okay?" Namjoon tried to get my attention for the fiftieth time today, but I found myself not being able to concentrate. We had just got home and straight away I had found a seat for myself on the floor already lost in thought.

"yeah I'm alright" I sighed sending him a faint smile before returning to my meditative position of holding my head in my hands as my elbows propped me up on the table. I hadn't really been myself since Bang told us about the photo... he said it wasn't too bad... but that didn't mean I wasn't disappointed in myself.

"Y/n" Yoongi say straight through me, my dazed off expression making it obvious the reality of my emotions. "It's going to be fine" He sounded serious and honestly he was probably right, so I nodded my head with a sigh.

"hey stop being a poopey brain and cheer up!" Taehyung whined sitting down next to me on the floor. I looked up at him with a confused smile...

"Taehyung" Namjoon spoke softly, worried that maybe I wasn't in the mood.

"poopey brain?" I repeated...this kid was hilarious.

"Yeah Poopppeyyy" he leaned in close exaggerating the word while poking my arm attempting to get a reaction out of me.

"say that again... I dare you" I couldn't help but smile at him, he was trying to cheer me up, the way he knew worked for me.

"don't fight she's still ill remember!" Jin warned, but was left unheard by the younger boy.

"POOPEY!" he cried before I was tackling him to the floor with a small giggle flying past my lips. I grabbed his hands before they could fight against me and placed them above his head as I straddled his lap. However he was a growing boy... meaning... he was getting stronger. "You think you can overpower ME little girl?!" he laughed, pushing his arms back with all his might showing how he could easily beat me.

Seeing my defeat coming, I gave up, my desire to fight had left me and instead the realisation that I'd be going home tomorrow hit me... "Buttercup?" Tae saw my shift In attitude instantly, his eyes became worried as I let go of his hands and started to lean down to cuddle into the crook of his neck.

"Y/n-ie" Jimin shifted closer placing a hand on my thigh.

"buttercup what's wrong?" Taehyung's hands automatically came around my back to hold me closer. He pushed us both into a sitting position as he rubbed circles into my back.

"I just don't have a good feeling about going home" I admitted in a pathetic laugh... my dread was evident. There was a collective silence around the room as I felt all the boys take a moment to gather their words.

"ah... we know Y/n-ie, but it won't be forever" Taehyung cooed to me like a father consoling a small child... it was weird... it was mature.

"since when did you get so grown up?" I pulled back to look at him a little shocked at his tone.

"Since I realised I have to protect my little beanie" He smiled dragging a hand through my hair. "my buttercup is so delicate and sweet, I can't let anyone hurt her" I felt so treasured, so loved and safe... I would truly miss this feeling... but not as much as I was going to miss them. "like a little butterfly".

"she is a little butterfly isn't she" Jungkook giggled from his spot on the floor.

"I like that... butterfly" Namjoon smiled looking at me with soft eyes as he repeated the word. I liked it too...