Sincerely, The girl who left words Unsaid

34. You and I _Harrison Storm

'Dear Jenny,

Not very often I have found myself unable to find words that said what I felt and I cannot tell you how much I enjoyed reading every word you sent. These letters are like stories you wish to get inked on yourself.  

I always knew you write bloody brilliantly but never could I have imagined that you felt so many things and still could manage to shelter yourself away. I don't understand whether it's a sign of strength or weakness when one doesn't say. But, I cannot imagine either how badly it hurt in the process. 

I wanted your words and you gave me enough for a lifetime I suppose and for that, I will be indebted to you always. I don't even know where to begin and how to reply to each letter. Some words made me bleed while some healed but the beauty of reading them was hearing your voice in my head. You have a very beautiful voice and I just hope I don't forget it. What I mean to say is that please don't stop talking to me.

I don't care what the world would think about you and me and whether our stories would be felt when read. I don't care if Shane turns out to be the infatuated obsession and his name that becomes a synonym for the creeps you would want to avoid. But, if I don't write us down now I don't think I will be. These memories are fresh and the details are live in my head. I don't want to miss out on anything and I don't want to write something that's not true.

I want you to be remembered.

I don't even know how am I going to dance toe to toe with you in this game of words. But, I guess I will be constantly checking this account hoping you wrote. Unsaid words sound so perfect and I promise you that I won't ever leave anything unsaid with you and it goes without saying, it is always about whom you want to say things to first, and it will be you and it will always be written here. 

I am not that cool to find a perfect way to start or end these letters as you do because I don't think there is any other way I want to call you and I don't want to be a stranger who wrote to you. But there is something we share in common a little bit too much. We always are listening to music.

So, with every letter, I will give you a song that will have only one intention, to sweep you off your feet. I will try not to repeat any artist and find the best of the best that probably exists, the songs that just say our story slightly better than us. And maybe if you are a lucky fool, would just send somethings I have written down that's never be read before. 

Yours, 

Shane.'

He wrote this down and thought about whether it even made any sense and whether it was even remotely half as good as what she wrote. It didn't take too long to remember every incident she mentioned in those letters and now when he knew what she felt it became harder for him to hope for something magical to happen.

The time was running out for him because in few days he would be gone for good. He didn't trust time and distance. Not every relationship has the luxury of riding the tides of time smoothly. He knew people and how they are when the situation changes for them. 

People talk about how despite being away for a year or so they meet their old friends and talk about nothing really changed and they don't feel any difference in their behavior and affection for each other. They relive those memories and they drink their hearts out. They start formally but end up sharing everything they didn't talk about for a while and in no time their cups are full and they again become people who still know each other completely.

True but that's a bullshit excuse-filled story that undermines their relation. 

The reason why everything they say happens is that they allowed their relationship to be built to a point of no return. Don't let one year fade your memory of how you walked in each other's shoes through thick and thin. Don't forget that you guys were a part of all the happiness and sorrows, good things and bad decisions, and a part of all their embarrassing stories.

Only when your bond has come to a point where you have given your all only then no time, distance and space could affect you. Sometimes, that bond is built over one night, sometimes it takes a decade-long friendship and sometimes it also happens that it took a lifetime but never happened.

Jenny wasn't the one Shane was willing to lose. He knew that if in the remaining few days he didn't make her feel something close to what he felt, he will just become another or maybe not even a chapter in her life.

He spent the rest of the night waiting for the dawn to break and go to his college to see her again. He smoked as he heard 'Diary of Jane by Breaking Benjamin'.