I solemnly swear that I am up to no good | Professor Remus Lupin

Chapter 52- Confessions

I took my time writing down the answers to all the questions and tasks on the papers in front of me, but I still was one of the first ones to finish. Remus looked up from his desk, when I handed him my finished exam.

„See you later, Maeve" he said with a smirk hidden in his friendly smile. It took me a few seconds before I realized, that he meant the practical portion.

I grabbed my bag before I left his classroom, when I closed the door I turned around to look at him. He had been watching me already and I smiled to myself, when he blushed because I had noticed it.

My feet carried me to the grounds of Hogwarts and I sat down on one of the stone benches, that faced the lake and the forrest around it. It was a beautiful and peaceful view. I pulled my walkman out of my bag and put my headphones in. A disk with Elton John songs was playing, a mix I had made myself with my favorite songs from him. Time passed and I was leaning against the stone railing, quietly singing along to one of the songs, when I noticed someone coming up next to me. I didn't even need to look who it was, to know who was leaning against the stone next to me. Remus. I smiled before I turned around to him.

„What are you listening to?" He asked me curious after I took off my headphones. Instead of answering his question I placed the headphones on his head, so he was listening to „Teacher I need you". We both laughed when he realized which song it was.

„Excellent choice" he said still laughing, when he handed me back the headphones.

„Who is your favorite singer?" I asked him. I only knew that he listened to Fleetwood Mac, because we danced to their music during the holidays.

„Billy Joel" he answered without hesitation and I couldn't help but chuckle.

„I love him too...but that's such an old man thing to say" I told him and couldn't stop laughing. Remus chuckled too and played a little offended.

„It's hot" I added with a smirk. He returned the smile and stepped a little closer to me, so our shoulders met. He stroke over my hand gently and we looked onto the grounds, admiring the beautiful view.

„This saturday is a full moon" he stated, looking down at our hands.

„I know, but you don't need to worry...the potion helps, right?" I asked worried. „Yes...but the transformation is still painful and even though I know, that I stay myself or at least my mind, I am still scared I could hurt someone...especially since I met you. I could never forgive myself, if I would hurt you..." he told me. It made me really sad seeing him this worried and scared of himself.

„As long as you take the potion nothing can go wrong...I can understand your worries, but I have read that many werewolves, that take the potion just go to a quiet place and sleep through the night..." I said trying to comfort him. He nodded and smiled lightly.

„Then I will try that..." he said and faced the lake again.

„And about the transformation...maybe I could try to comfort you..." I said with a smirk, causing him to look back to me with a risen eyebrow. When he realized what I meant a smirk formed on his lips.

„I would really really love to...but...what if I hurt you? And you better not watch the transformation..." he said stroking over my hand again.

„Remus, I already watched you transform and that was without the potion and nothing happened."

„Nothing happened..." he said and let out a dry laugh „...i could have killed you. I may ran away, but I will never have this control again. When I transformed I usually lost all control over myself. We were lucky, very lucky in that night...I don't even want to imagine what could have happened..."