I Joked About No One Wanting To Be Reincarnated In Attack on Titan And Well...

Chapter 6: I Had To Let Go

Author's Note: So last chapter seems a little shorter than usual, huh? The rest of the chapters before that were like 3-4k long and that one has 2. I'm probably going to coninue to experiment in writing in different perspectives cause it's a thing I've always kind of sucked at doing. Same with tenses. I'm not good with those. Anyways. Blessica, the hell is she doing staring at Armin as Eren as they both die? Who knows cause literally have no idea either. Criticisms everyone? Vote? Comment? Advice? I'm up for it! Enjoy this one.

._.

I am almost convinced that I didn't do anything wrong. I stand there in silence, almost stalkingly staring at Armin, who by now is frozen and in daze after the near horrifying event his eyes ever laid on. There wasn't much to do. We both are the only ones left alive.

I know this not to be completely true of course. Eren is going to come back, completely alive and more than well. With his powers this time and more powerful than how weak he's always been the past few years.

But what is this?  I question myself.

It's an aching and infuriating—almost disgusting feeling planted in my chest. It isn't as if I could've done something to help out. Is it so that I suppose should help out and save the others? I have the capabilities to do just that. But should I have? This was an important scene in the story that brought in a new found discovery for the people in this island. It wouldn't have happened if I interfered. But is that even right? I left those others to die. I could've done something. But I didn't.

Is it even possible to interfere as well as maintain the main flow of the story?

I am brought back to an earlier memory of the years before I was brought into this incredibly grueling world. For my own entertainment during the whole quarantine in the 2019-2020 covid lockdowns, I decided to induldge myelf into an assorted types and numbers of different books world-wide that I entirely fell in love with and continued to be in the following years. However, of the so many stories I read in books about reincarnation, time travel, and the sort, not one has always ended the same way that the original tale had in its plans.

Cause even a single person, no matter how powerful or weak, can be enough to change history.

This is proven by the riots and rallies that happened in America during the same time period that the covid appeared and caused a pandemic. This was due to the death of a single black US citizen. No one could've expected that all the chaos happened after that would cause world-wide news.

Does this mean, I should not just let it all go, the way as the story should? I thought to myself with a hand covering my lips cause I didn't like the sound of it. The very idea would despise me if I was the creator of aot myself. Does this mean I shouldn't worry about these things and just allow myself to be taken wherever? What if the changes are too intimidatingly enormous? The story is created with the idea of the lives of these already existing people in mind...not me. I'm not supposed to be a part of this place at all. I'm ruining it.

But is it really that bad? To have the desire to change everything?

I can't answer that even. I kneel down. My legs, that've been unmovable for the past minutes I stood still, decides give up on me. "Ah..." I muster, clutching the fabric covering my chest, and arching my body down facing the roof. It's too confusing. "Could I have made a better descision than to just stand there? Would it have mattered if I did anything? Would they...still be alive?"

I knew I'd start to strive to find my own place in this cruel environment. But at what cost? Regrets? When making friends and rebuilding your life over again only to leave them to lose their lives just cause the story says so? Would I even continue to allow that? When they aren't just characters to me anymore but actual qpeople filled with so much life?