Fate is a fighter

Chapter 29 - you mean nothing to me

Chapter 29 - you mean nothing to me

" 'A Baby mama, a boxer and a childhood sweetheart – Jordan Shaw's threesome'. Cleo Monteguini, an old flame of the famous boxer, Jordan Shaw, known to many as the 'Ravager', currently pregnant with his child, was spotted shopping for new baby things, alone, whilst the boxer cuddled up to his current girlfriend, Avery Watts, on a park bench. Is Cleo going to raise her child alone? Is Jordan going to be an absent father? What does the high school sweetheart, turned homewrecker, Avery think of all this? I don't know about you Ralph but – "

"Turn that crap off," grumbled Jordan walking into the kitchen. Dahlia picked up the remote and turned off the gossip channels, which I was grateful for because I didn't want to hear another word.

"Am I really a homewrecker?" I said quietly, more to myself than to anyone else, but of course Jordan heard me. He came straight over to me, placing his warm, calloused hands on my face, tilting my head up to look him dead in the eyes.

"You are not a homewrecker baby, you make me so happy, you are my one true love. Cleo and I weren't together, we've never been together, we just had sex. I know you and I might now have a bit of a dysfunctional family, but you haven't done anything wrong. You're amazing, okay?" he reassured me, and even though I listened to his every word, they still didn't make me feel settled, but just to please him, I nodded; I didn't want him stressing out over something as small as me.

"I swear if I see that Jeanette Brundy in the street, I'm smacking her straight in the face," said Dahlia, referring to the gossip news anchor who had just called me a homewrecker.

"Not if I get there first," muttered Jordan, before kissing me softly on the forehead, and letting me go.

***

It was a Saturday today, and it was one of Jordan's boxing matches too, after lunch. I was in two minds about whether or not to go. On the one hand, I wanted to be there to support him, I loved going to his boxing matches, even if I was terrified most of the time that he was going to get seriously injured, but I also find it so attractive, and after most of them we do end up having sex in his changing room.

On the other hand, there are a lot of people there, a lot of paparazzi, a lot of cameras and people asking questions. Furthermore, Cleo is going to be there. If, for example, someone was to take a photo where it was Jordan and I holding hands or something, right next to Cleo, it would just spread the rumour even more about how awful of a person I am, keeping Jordan from his baby mama, being selfish and a bitch. I just hate the way the press can turn a story any way they want to, without any thought as to how it actually affects the people involved; it's horrible.

"You coming babe?" Jordan asked me, walking into our room where I was sat on the bed, deliberating my options, whilst scrolling through twitter feeds saying how much of a bitch I am.

"I don't know," I sighed.

"What?" he looked up at me, before walking to me and grabbing the laptop from my hands, taking a read of what I was looking at. "Why are you looking at these lies Aves?"

"I can't help it," I sighed, putting my head in my hands.

"This crap doesn't deserve to be read, these people have no lives, they don't even know the truth," Jordan said angrily, throwing the laptop onto the bed.

"Tell me honestly Jordan, if I wasn't here, if I didn't exist, if I never came back into your life, would you be with Cleo right now, dating her, going through the pregnancy together?" I asked, looking him dead in the eye.

"No," he said, without a beat, "if I wanted to be with her, I would be with her. I don't have feelings like that for her. Yes, I will have to spend time with her, I will have to co-parent with her, but I feel nothing romantically towards her, nor have I ever."

"I so want to believe you," I said quietly.

"I know it's hard for you, I couldn't even imagine how I would feel if you were having a child with another man, you are being so good, the best girlfriend I could ever even dream of. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, I understand if it's too much for you," he said, holding my hand.

"No, I'm here with you and for you, and we will get through it, there will just be hard days, and the media doesn't help," I laughed bitterly.

"I'll get my publicist to pull some strings okay? Come to my match babe, I need you there," he pleaded. After a second or two I agreed, and a smile lit up his face. "Come on, we both need a shower," he smirked, dragging me into the ensuite.

The match went well. I wasn't sat directly next to Cleo, luckily; the guys were in between us, as well as Noah and Tabs, with Dahlia on my other side. Jordan won, of course, and I stood, and I clapped for him, but I still wasn't feeling it. Every single time I looked to my right I could see Dahlia, I could see her bump, I could see her holding it as she watched Jordan, with his baby growing inside her. Then I could see Tabs and Oli, with him holding her every single second, caressing her bump, kissing her. That is the way Cleo and Jordan should be, but I got in the way. No wonder Cleo hates me. She hasn't said anything since about keeping Jordan's baby from him, but I wouldn't be surprised if she cornered me again, and I can see the million words she wants to say to me based on the death glares she often throws my way.

At the end of the match, I went back into Jordan's changing room and waited for him to come in. We did our usual routine of showering together, having sex, getting changed, and walking out, hand-in-hand. This time when we left though things were a bit different. He froze, staring directly at two middle aged people. I didn't know who they were, I had never seen either of them in my life, but Jordan knew them.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" he growled out, staring daggers at the two of them. I squeezed his hand lightly, assuring him I was still there for him, and I saw the tension in his muscles relax slightly.

"We know we messed up darling, b-b-but we want to be here, we want to know our grandchild, we don't want to miss out on its life like we missed out on yours," the woman said. Grandchild?! These must be his parents, although I don't even think he likes referring to them as parents. They had been absent from his life for years before I even met him or Grace, and he basically had to raise himself and his little sister on his own. That's why he got into boxing, to make some money to be able to provide for himself and his sister.

"You mean nothing to me," he stated, his expression stone cold, his jaw clenched.

"Jordy, darling, please?" his 'mother' practically begged.

"Come on, let's go," he said to me, placing his hand on the small of my back and basically guiding me to the exit.

The car ride back to my apartment was silent. Jordan was clenching the wheel hard the entire time, and I could tell how tense he was. When we parked in the car park for my apartment, and I undid my seatbelt, Jordan just stayed still, staring forwards through the front at absolutely nothing. I placed my hand over his, which was still gripping the steering wheel, and he turned his hand so that his fingers were interlocked with mine.

"Let's go to bed," I said, softly. He just nodded his head, and followed me up the stairs. We got ready for bed in silence, it wasn't an awkward silence, more of a meaningful silence; I knew Jordan had a lot running through his mind. When we cuddled that night in my bed, I knew his mind was far, far away from where he actually was, and I knew when I drifted off to sleep, it would be taking him a lot longer to actually fall asleep.

***

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