The beginning of Gwyn and Azriel

Fragile

  Gwyn could sense that something was wrong.

  Azriel eyes always revealed  the truth, even when his words did not.

  She watched how he had reacted during the High Lord's speech...how he was unable to even speak to her after.

  Azriel was always haunted with his demons, but tonight had been an extreme. His shadows seemed to be screaming at Gwyn to stand by him.

  But, when they arrived home, he was quick to race away from her, mumbling some excuse about his clothing.

  Azriel had been in the bathing room for over an hour, but Gwyn had not heard any splash of water. She stood on her feet and made her way to the door. Her knuckles drummed against the door, and she waited for his response.

  Gwyn became worried and decided to let herself into the washroom.

  Azriel was sitting on the edge of the tub, body still covered in blood, his head was in his trembling hands.

 "Az," she whispered, nearing him.

  He did not look up...he did not move.

  Gwyn just went to sit beside him, placing a reassuring hand on his knee.

 "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.

  His hands skimmed up, pulling at his hair aggressively. 

  Gwyn went to kneel in front of him, so that she could see his face.

 "Baby, please.." she breathed.

 "Please, don't shut me out..."

  Azriel finally lifted his head, and Gwyn was rewarded with blood shot eyes.

 "I feel like a monster, Gwyn.."

 "I cannot even stand the sight of you when I come home in blood..." he added.

 "Az-"

 "No, please... I need to say this."

  Gwyn just nodded and waited.

 "I go and do these horrible deeds...unspeakable things, and then I come home to my beautiful Priestess.."

  She grabbed onto his hands, encouraging him to speak his truth.

 "The man I killed was horrid, but he looked me in the eye and said it was an honour to be killed by the King of Monsters."

 "Oh, Azriel! You have to know, that it is not true," she gripped him.

 "How can it not be? I have been torturing for five hundred years, Gwyn."

  There was a long silence.

 "And the worst part...I loved it all...I loved the pain and the blood," he turned his face, his brows furrowing.

 "Because the truth is...I am a sick monster with scarred hands," he spat out.

 "Baby, I have seen that monster and it does not terrify me," Gwyn started, rubbing his hands.

 "You know how I feel about your hands..." she ran a thumb on them both.

 "You say that Gwyn, but I am scared every second that one day you will wake up and think they are no longer beautiful. I am scared that one day you will realize how horrendous they really are."

 "Azriel, I think we both have the same insecurities...we are both so scared every minute. I know because I feel it every second," she paused. "You think I am not scared every second, Azriel? You think I sleep well when you are gone? You think I give a damn about your past or what you do for a living?"

  He just watched her with intrigue.

 "I know your heart...I know the goodness in it," Gwyn trailed one hand to his chest.

 "This is the heart that trained the Valkyries in his own time. This is the heart that donated millions to a charity for assaulted women....This is heart that melted the ice around my own..."

  He was fighting back words...holding himself from the demons. 

  Azriel sighed out, shaking his head in the process.

 "The man you picture is a man who does not lie, correct?"

 "Yes," she answered, confusion marked her senses. 

 "I do not ever want to lie to you, so-"

 "So?" she raised a brow.

 "I wanted to wait until after Starfall..." he barely made a sound.

 "Wait for what?"

 "Wait to tell you...what I discovered."

  Gwyn just sat on her knees, not sure what to say or do.

 "I discovered one terrible thing...and one good thing."

  Gwyn just breathed as she watched him.

  She could see how much he struggled with it all.

 "I pleaded with Rhys, to let me tell you after Starfall...until we knew for sure," his forehead creased. 

 "We want Amren to fully investigate it before we make an official announcement.."

 "An announcement about what?"

 "When I was in the woods, I was swarmed with the Nightmare Suriel's again...and they revealed two things.

  Gwyn just observed and analysed. 

  Azriel lowered his head again...with a look of defeat.

  Her Shadowsinger could no longer keep secrets from her that much was evident...

  But, she also craved to live in oblivion for a little longer.

  In all honesty, Gwyn was not in a rush to hear more bad news, not when she was living her best life with him.

 She was not in rush to face the darkness that came with tragedy. 

  Gwyn wanted to enjoy her first Starfull with her m-

 "You know what...do not tell me until after Starfall then," Gwyn announced.

  Azriel just parted his lips in shock, registering her words.

 Then, she placed a gentle hand to his cheek, "What was the good thing, baby?"

  Azriel's head snapped up, his eyes wide with empathy. Then he grasped her hands and pulled her up into his lap.

 "I do not know if I am ready to say it yet..." he murmured in her ear.

 "I am burning with anticipation, Shadowsinger.."

  She felt him smile...felt him hold her tighter.

 "They revealed that if we did survive the curse and chose a life together then.." he paused, facing her fully.

 "Then what," she ran her hands to grip his shoulders.

 "Then, when the time came, after many years, we would be.." his voice shook, tears gathered in his eyes.

 "Yes," she breathed.

 "We would be parents to twins... " he gasped out.

 "What?" she sobbed suddenly. 

  Azriel just connected their foreheads, cupping her cheeks gently.

"Gwyn, we would have two baby girls.."