Love Me Right

Making Sure

Yuju's POV

Two weeks have passed since Eunha and I broke up. I am hurt for doing that but I know this is the best for us. I love Eunha but I can see in her eyes that she keeps on missing Sowon unnie. She will sometimes mention her name even I am the one beside her and it's killing me inside. 

I love her but I don't want to be selfish and keep her forever. I want her to be sure if I'm still the one inside her heart and I want to make sure if I really deserve a girl like her. I love Eunha but she loved me more. I'm afraid to say that I don't love her as much as she loves me. She did everything for me especially being part of Sinb's bullying games just to save my scholarship.

 I'm afraid to say that I'm not worthy for her love.

"Eunha, I love you. I really do that's why I'm afraid. I'm afraid to say that I can never love you as much as you love me. I know you deserve a better girl than me. I want to do everything for you but...Do I really deserve you?" I asked myself. I am currently sitting on a bench inside the park. I decided to went at the nearest park, thinking about my uncertain future with Eunha.

I suddenly remembered Sowon unnie. After all the secrets have been revealed, I became awkward with her and Yerin unnie. Even inside the Student Council office, we won't talk and joke like how we used to do before. I missed being their friends but I know to myself that they both have a reason to avoid me.

Rain started to pour down making me surprise. I don't know that it will rain today, I forgot to bring an umbrella. I want to run away and look for some shelter but I can't move my feet. I am feeling so down today so I let myself get soaked under the rain. Besides, it wasn't a heavy rain, just a drizzle. I just stayed on my spot and do some reflections again. I suddenly realized that the rain keeps on pouring but I don't feel any raindrops on me now. I looked above me and saw a transparent umbrella protecting me under the rain. I am surprised then looked behind me. I saw Yerin unnie standing there letting herself get wet by the rain while holding the umbrella above my head. I stand up and she looked away from me.

"You don't have to do that, Yerin unnie. Just cover yourself with that umbrella." I said looking straight at her.

"But... you are already soaked and wet, Yuju. Let me cover you from the rain." Yerin unnie said still avoiding my eyes.

I smiled then walked closer to her. I hold her hand that's holding the umbrella and moved it to let the umbrella cover the two of us now. We are now standing face to face but she looked at the ground avoiding my eyes. I felt hurt because I really missed our closeness before. I don't want us to stay like this but I know that she has the right to avoid me.

"Thanks for what you did, Yerin unnie. I want to stay at this park more longer so if you want to go now, you can. Don't worry about me." I said with a sad smile.

Yerin unnie looked straight into my eyes. I feel lost in her eyes and smiled at her. I was shocked when she hugged me tight. My heart started beating so fast and I don't know why.

"Pabo-ya, Yuju. Do you think I won't worry about you? I keep on worrying since I started avoiding you. I...I missed you. I want to stay with you. Let me stay with you even just for today, Yuju. I really missed you."Yerin unnie said.

I smiled bitterly because of Yerin unnie's words. I can't believe that after all the secrets she learned about me, she still cares for me. I hugged her back and let my tears fall down. I really need some comfort and hug right now esp. from Yerin unnie. I'm happy to know that she will always be here for me.

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"Are you okay, Yuju? Don't feel uncomfortable, okay?"Yerin unnie said as she sat on the sofa beside me.

We are now inside her house after she called her driver to fetch us cause the rain became stronger. I feel uncomfortable because this is the first time I entered a big house. When I met Eunha, I know she is rich but she's already staying at her apartment that time so this is really a first time for me. I sighed then sipped the coffee that Yerin unnie gave me. She let me borrow her clothes and now, we are inside her room making me more uncomfortable. I looked at Yerin unnie and saw her silently sipping her own drink. She looked at me and smiled.

"What's wrong? Don't worry, I won't do anything bad to you. I told my maid to wash your clothes and dried it so that if your uncomfortable with my clothes, you can change back to your own clothes later." Yerin unnie said and I trust her.

"No. It's not like that,Yerin unnie. I am just uncomfortable because...this is the first time I entered a big house." I said honestly feeling shy. Yerin unnie just smiled at me. Her smile is always forcing me to smile back at her. It seems that her smile has a magic to make me smile too no matter how sad I am.

"Don't be nervous, Yuju. There's nothing wrong if I let you enter my house esp. my bedroom because you're my friend. My trusted friend." Yerin unnie said making me shock.

I put down the coffe mug at the coffee table in front of us before looking back at Yerin unnie who also did the same. She still considered me as a trusted friend after keeping a lot of secrets to her and Sowon unnie?

"I'm sorry Yerin unnie but...I think, I don't deserve to be called a trusted friend. I...I keep a painful secret from you and Sowon unnie."

Yerin unnie didn't say anything but hold both of my hands. My heart started beating fast again as we both stare on each others eyes.

"I still trust you and...I am still in love with you, Yuju." Yerin unnie said making me more shocked. S-She loves me? She's still in love with me? I don't know what to say. Yerin unnie laughed nervously. "I...I'm sorry if I didn't plan a better way of confession. This is sudden but...I don't want to hide my feelings to you anymore. I love you, Choi Yuju."

I can't believe that Yerin unnie has some special feelings for me. I don't know what to say because this is too sudden and...I am still thinking about Eunha. My heart is beating so fast now but I don't want to misinterpret everything again. I am still thinking about the real score of my relationship with Eunha that's why I don't want Yerin unnie to hope for my love.

"But...Yerin unnie..."

"I know. I know you have Eunha-ssi and you are both happy together but...I just want you to know that I love you. I won't force you to love me back, Yuju."

I smiled bitterly because Yerin unnie is so sweet. She wiped the tears in my eyes that I didn't notice falling. She smiled sweetly at me making me happy and guilty at the same time.

"Thanks for loving me Yerin unnie but...I don't want to hurt you. I think it was better if we will just stay friends for a while because...I'm still not over Eunha."

My heart hurt as I remember Eunha again. I want to run back in her arms but I don't know what's stopping me from doing that. Besides, I want her to realize who really owns her heart now.

"What? Why you have to get over Eunha-ssi? Did you two...broke up?" Yerin unnie asked hesitantly. I smiled bitterly again before nodding my head. Yerin unnie squeezed my hands making me looked back at her. She is looking at me with her warm gaze.

"Then...I will give you time to get over her. For now, let's be friends again and...enjoy each others company. Can we...do that Yuju?" Yerin unnie asked nervously and I nodded at her while smiling. She smiled back at me and we started talking about random things.

I'm happy cause we bring back our closeness. I am happy too cause she loves me but for now, I won't let my heart fall in love again. I need to heal my confused and broken heart first before accepting Yerin unnie's love for me. I don't want to be unfair for her like how I became unfair to Eunha.

I want to make sure that I'm no longer broken hearted if ever I accepted Yerin unnie's love for me. Because I know that needing someone and loving someone are two different things. I want to love Yerin unnie bacause I love her and not just because I need her to fix my broken heart.

End of Yuju's POV

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Author's Note: Yuju is really smart and a mature woman in this story. I hope Sinb can be like her too, kekeke. Anyways, don't be sad about Gfriend's sudden disbandment anymore. It's time to look forward for the members new beginnings, right? Thanks for reading.