Tony's whole body shook with sobs while he stared at his bloody hands covered in dirt and ash. Ash. Ashes from his kid. From his kid who just died in his arms. From his kid who begged to not go, for Tony to do anything, to save him and he didn't, he couldn't. Tony couldn't do anything except hold him while Peter begged and cried. He was helpless as he watched Peter slowly disappear and to be carried away by the wind. The worst part was, he wasn't even home, he couldn't even die peacefully. He died knowing they lost. Died knowing that Thanos had won and gotten away.
Tony cried till there were no tears left and he was left with the ugly noises coming out of his bruised and bloody body. Then, one question came to mind.
Why not me?
Why him, why Peter. Peter didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve to die like this.
Why not me? Why not me? Why not me?
Why not me? Was all Tony could think about. Why. Why did it have to be Peter? Anybody but him. It's like the universe knew what he loved most and had a plan to just rip it away from him. He felt hopeless, lost, devastated. Everything he felt was intense. So intense he almost didn't feel Nebula grab him by his arm and drag him towards the ship.
He didn't care what happened to him anymore, he lost the kid, his kid.
-----
Peter watched as the arc reactor fluttered off and the heartbeat of his mentor stop. Tony Stark was dead. He saved the universe and had died doing so, now his body layed there burnt and bloody.
Peter felt like he was gonna pass out, from grief or exhaustion he didn't know. He felt a steady hand on his shoulder and knew it was Rhodey. Uncle Rhodey, that's what he called him ever since Peter had basically became apart of Tony's family all those years ago.
"Breathe Pete, deep breaths"
Peter didn't even know he was having trouble controlling his breathing till Rhodey had said something. He felt his throat burn and his lungs scream for air he couldn't give them. Finally he gave in and did his best to take a deep breath no matter how shakey it was.
All he could look at was Tony. Tony's dead body right infront of him. He just had watched him die, he watched as the life flickered from his eyes. Peter felt a mix of intense emotions over come him. Anger, grief, all of it.
His fists shook while he clenched them at his side, shaking from the strain of his muscle. why did Tony do it? Why hadn't someone else done it?
Why didn't he do it? Why didn't Peter take the gauntlet? Thousands of questions ran through Peter head, swirling like a hurricane, but one question stuck out the most.
Why not me?
Why not me? Why? Peter should've snapped, should have been stronger and faster. Maybe if he were good enough, Tony would still be alive.
Why not me?
He finally felt the tears trial down his face, creating clear streaks against the dirt and blood. Then, his legs gave out but before he could fall or even acknowledge he was falling, Rhodey had grabbed on to him squeezing his shoulder to ground him.
Peter took another shakey breath his eyes still on Tony.
Why not me?
______________________________________
WOOOO ANGST YEAH, also sorry these are literally all out of order when posted, half the chapters in here are drafts 🌝 so they'll be posted not in order lol
YOU ARE READING
💫🧚♀️Spiderman/mcu oneshots🧚♀️💫 (Book 1)
Aksiyon(U can skip the first 3 chapters they suck lol, I promise my writing gets better) I might do this idk, I love giving in to my obsessions 🙄😌 this will probably be like: angst, field trips to stark tower, some ships, spider bros(miles and Peter bein...
