|In The Dark|

35

Hate Me

TIME JUMP: 1 WEEK
ANNABELLE LUPIN-BLACK

I can't do it. I can't look into his blue eyes and break his heart. But I have to.

I've been avoiding them all week. Every class I have with Theo or Draco or Blaise or Pansy, I sit in the back and rush out the second it ends. I hide in empty corridors or my dorm whenever I can. I haven't talked to them since Monday. I've been putting it off. All of it. But I can't anymore. It's Friday and classes have just ended. I'm officially on the clock. 7 hours. That's all I have.

I'm sitting at the Gryffindor table pushing my food around and watching the Slytherin table. They are all talking, quietly. Theo keeps looking over and everytime he does, I look away. "I'll meet up with you guys later." I said. Harry nodded at me and I quickly grabbed my bag. I walked out and headed down the hall. I could hear their footsteps following me. "Belle!" Theo called out.

I stopped and turned around. Theo, Draco, Blaise and Pansy all stood there in front of me. "

"What the hell is going on?" Theo asked. "Why are you ignoring us?" Draco asked.

I didn't know what to say. But I knew Draco wouldn't let this go if he was worried about me. So I had to make them mad. Mad enough to ignore me back. Mad enough to hate me.

"Bloody hell! Why do you think I've been ignoring you?" I snapped. Their faces fell. "I don't want to be seen with you snakes. We aren't friends and I was stupid for ever getting mixed up with you." I said. "What?" Theo said in a shaky voice. "What are you talking about?" Pansy asked. "You are a bitch Parkinson, I don't know why I ever even talked to you. No wonder everyone hates you. I practically had to beg my friends to let you stay when we went dress shopping." I said. I'm so sorry, Pansy. I'm so sorry. Tears filled her eyes and she opened her mouth but nothing came out. She just shook her head and walked away. "That was fucked up Annabelle, really fucked up." Blaise said and he ran after her. Draco and Theo looked at me.

"What is wrong with you?!" Draco exclaimed. "I just finally figured out why I was so screwed up. It was you guys who got me to start smoking, you guys who got me drinking, everything bad was because of you!" I yelled. "I- I thought- you said- you told me you loved me. Do you- was that a lie?" Theo said. There were tears in his eyes. I forced away the ones in mine. "Yes. If I hadn't gone looking for you that night of the Yule Ball, I never would have been alone in that hallway." I spat. Theo's breath became uneven and tears fell to his cheeks. "Belle please-" he started. "Don't call me that! I hate it and I hate you!" I snapped. Theo wiped his tears and his eyes went dark. "I hate you too." he said. Then he stormed off.

"What about me? You hate me too." Draco said. I glared at him and said the only thing I knew would make him leave me. "Just leave me the fuck alone or I'll tell everyone your secret." I said. His face dropped and he shook his head. "Even after everything, after we were the ones that were there for you. Even after I dragged you out of that damn lake and made you promise me not to break Theo's heart, you went and did it anyway. Go ahead and tell whoever you want about me, I'd rather my father finish me off then have to watch Theo crumble again. You probably just broke him forever." he said. "Next time, leave me in the lake." I said. "I will." he said back. Then he ran to catch up with Theo. I ran into the abandoned girls bathroom and collapsed against the wall. "Muffliato." I mumbled. The room was silenced and I screamed. I screamed and let out all the pain and agony I felt as I watched my friends' faces. I broke Theo's heart and it was all lies. Everything I said was a lie. But he'll never know that. I'm so sorry Theo.

He was all I was living for, what do I do now that I lost him too?

I finally ran out of tears and stood up. I walked over to the sink and splashed some water on my face. Then I took a breath and walked out. I wanted to get straight to my dorm but of course not.

"Annabelle-" my dad called out. I turned around and he stood in the doorway of his classroom. He had that look on his face. "Come here," he said. I walked in and he shut the door.

"I have a lot of homework dad, so whatever this-" I started. "What happened?" he asked. "What?" I said. "Pansy Parkinson walked by crying a bit ago. I asked her what happened and Blaise Zabini told me to ask you." he said. I shrugged. "Did you all get into a fight?" he asked. "Something like that." I mumbled. "What about Theo?" he asked. "What about him?" I said. "Are you two ok?" he asked. My eyes watered again and I blinked back tears. "We broke up." I said. His face fell and sadness filled his eyes. "Why? He made you so happy." he said. A tear slipped down my cheek and I wiped it away. "I know. But I can't be with him." I said.

"Annabelle, Tell me what happened," he said. I shook my head. "Kiddo, just talk to me. It's me." he said. I didn't know what to say. So I went with the partial truth. "I cheated on him." I said. He furrowed his brow. "You cheated on him?!" he exclaimed. I nodded. "Annabelle, I find that very hard to believe," he said. "Well I'm just full of surprises. Add it to the list of ways I've disappointed you." I snapped. Then I grabbed my bag and walked out.

I got to the Gryffindor common room and Edmund was sitting on the couch. He locked eyes with me and smirked. I went straight to my dorm and tried to shut the door but he stuck his foot in before I could. He pushed the door open and I stumbled back and dropped my bag. "Did you do it?" he asked. I nodded. He walked over and lifted my chin. He wiped a tear and gave me that cruel smile. "Good job." he said smugly. "Now will you leave me alone?" I asked. He laughed.

"I'm just getting started," he said. He pulled off
my shirt and pushed me onto my bed. "Wait- Edmund- just wait-please!" I stammered. He pinned my wrists down and his grip was so tight I cried out in pain. "Please Edmund- what if Hermione and Ginny-" I started. "Well then you better please me quickly." he said. He tore down my underwear and forced himself inside me. And I let him. This time I knew I deserved it. After what I did, after what I said to Pansy, Blaise, raco and Theo, I deserve everything Edmund does to me.

He finished quickly and got dressed. The second the door shut, I immediately got in the shower. I scrubbed away any trace of him. I let the tears flow and the scalding hot water burned me. I tried not to think about Theo but his beautiful blue eyes and the tears falling down his cheeks kept creeping into my mind. I put my clothes on and looked at the shirt Edmund ripped off me.

"Incendio" I said, pointing my wand at my shirt. It disappeared to embers and I walked out. Ginny and Hermione were sitting on their beds talking. They immediately went silent when I walked out. Gee, I wonder where this is going. Maybe they are going to ask if I'm ok...

"Hey Anna-" Ginny said, looking at Hermione hesitantly. "Whatever you guys have to say, just say it. I'm not glass and I won't shatter." I said. Hermione sighed. "Fine. Why was Edmund here?" she asked. My face fell. Ok, I wasn't expecting that. I'd hoped nobody saw him leave.

"He was getting notes." I said. "Really?" Ginny said, her voice full of doubt. "That's strange because the only class you have with him is DADA and we didn't do any notes today." Hermione said. "Fucking hell, are you stalking me?" I snapped. "No. But we are-" Ginny started. "Worried?" I said cutting them off. They nodded. "Don't be. If I wrote down a list of reasons to kill myself, Edmund wouldn't even make the top 10." I said. Their faces dropped. "I'm going to smoke. Please don't follow me." I said. I grabbed my cigarettes and left.

I got to the Astronomy Tower and prayed it was empty. But when I turned the corner, I saw those brown curls. Theo turned around and I looked at him. His eyes were red and puffy and there were tears on his cheeks. "I'll leave." I said. I started to go when,  "Wait!" he said. So I stopped.