Untreated Wounds | Sirius Black

Chapter 29

MARY MCDONALD'S POV:

I used my key to open the apartment Sirius and I used to live in together. I had to pick the rest of my clothes up.

"Sirius!" I called out as I entered the home but I soon fell silent at the sight in front of me.

One day. It took Sirius one day without me to go back to her.

There they were. With his arms around her on the ground by the fire sound asleep as if he didn't get down on one knee for me. As if we weren't going to get married in March. As if we didn't talk about a future — our future.

God, he was pathetic. He couldn't help himself, could he? 

One fucking night and his arms were around her all over again.

It was because every goddamn night, he imagined that it was her he was holding, not me. He didn't need to take time to grieve the ring I lost because I was just some replacement. Just some replacement to close his eyes when he fucks me to think about Lillian. 

Lillian and her vicious hazel eyes -- or what did Sirius call them in one of his love letters? Forest-like. And her untamed and knotty auburn curls. And all of the messy freckles that covered her face. What made her so special? What made her worth so much more than me?

But Lillian was so beautiful.

She always had been. And Sirius had always known that. Lillian, Lillian, Lillian -- I hate her -- she's vicious and evil -- I love her -- I've always loved her -- I'll always love her. 

It had always been Lillian.

As I closed the front door slowly, Lillian reshuffled and sat up drowsily. The shirt she wore was Sirius's. But as she sat up, facing away from me and as she lifted her arms above her head to stretch — I was left feeling incredibly ill.

They weren't cuts on her skin — they were gorges. They were jagged, they were deep, they were raw and they ran up the entirety of her lower back.

Lillian turned to Sirius who was holding her and she just stared at him for a few moments. I watched her stagger to her feet, turning around to meet my gaze.

I watched the way her eyes widened. I saw the fear in those hazel eyes for a brief moment. 

"Mary," She glanced down at Sirius. Her voice was weak when she turned back to me, "I... I'm sorry. I didn't know where else to go,"

Nowhere else, huh? I could name an entire list before she had to go to him. 

Still, I should've known, that only Sirius could save her.

"It's fine," I said, stiffly, "I'm just here to collect my things,"

"I'm sorry,"

"Don't be," I hissed, bitterly, "It's fine,"

"No, it's not, Mary." Lillian protested in a strained voice.

My eyes began to roam unintentionally. Her thighs had the same kinds of scars Sirius had. And her collarbones had a large silver streak slicing across them. Her cheekbone was bruised and her lip had a slice of dried blood through it.

How could she be beaten and bloody but still beautiful?

"It doesn't matter. I'm just picking up some clothes — I didn't mean to wake you." I folded my arms over my chest,

"Mary..."

"Lillian, I don't care." I lied, "Merry Christmas."

"Christmas?" Lillian furrowed her brows.