NEVER NOT • H.RENJUN

21

| chapter twenty-one |
love me, renjun..
« say you love me, say you love me
till the end of the world »

Renjun was stunned into silence. Her words made him feel a multitude of things at once. In front of him, Hyewon was doubting herself. His silence and lack of expression drove her crazy. Is it too early? Bad timing? Does he feel the same way? What if he doesn't?!

"Hyewon," he said pointedly. "Do you know what you're saying? You know we can't love each other." He ran a hand through his hair. "Angels don't belong with demons."

Hyewon's frustration didn't diminish as he kept disregarding her. "You think I don't know that?" She glared at him. "Well, Renjun, I do. I know. But how the hell am I supposed to make my heart understand. I don't even know why, but it is so fucking stubborn on loving you."

There's a moment of silence, and then with her heart in her hand, Hyewon continued, "When I think of you, I know that eventually I will hurt you. But I want to be with you and stay with you, Renjun. I never want to let go..for as long as I can hold onto you."

Tears began to spill from Renjun's eyes. He wanted to hold her in his embrace, comfort her, and love her. But fear continued to wear him down.

The demon took it upon herself to act first. She walked up to him, cupped his face with her hand, and smiled. She stared into his eyes for a minute before speaking again.

"Love me, Renjun."

The angel took a hold of her arms and pulled her in. He wrapped his arms around her. Tight and warm. "I do, Hyewon," he mutters in a whisper. "I love you so much."

She held him, too, wrapping her arms around his waist and nuzzling her head in the warmth of his neck. She heaved a sigh of relief.

They stayed like that for a while. In silence. They held onto each other as if they were scared to let go. Renjun pulled away first. But not completely, only enough to look into her eyes.

"I want to be with you," he told her. "I want to hold your hand, hug you, and kiss you like human couples do. I love you. I think I have since the day I met you, Hyewon."

Hyewon smiled at him, she leaned in placing her forehead against his, "Don't push me away anymore. I'm not scared. And I promise that I am willing to risk it all for you."

. . .

"How did this happen?" The angel asked as he treated her open wounds. Hyewon silently winced as the alcohol pad came in contact with her blemished skin. She was used to the pain but she couldn't hide the fact that even though she was a demon, she still felt things, physical and emotional.

"I had a stupid argument with Hani," she said. Renjun shook his head to show his disapproval. "It's fine. I don't feel any pain remember. Plus the scars will heal in a few days."

"But it still hurts you, doesn't it?" He said and she shrugged, "It's whatever. It's just a small sting. I can handle it."

Renjun sighed, dropped the pad of alcohol, and looked up at her. "You don't have to do that. Not with me." He took her hand and rubbed the pad of his thumb on the skin. "If you are in pain say so. If you are sad say so. Even if you are feeling happy, tell me. I know that demons are known for being heartless and mean. But I don't believe that. You were once human, too." His eyes locked with hers and for the millionth time since the day they met, he got lost in the depths of their dark beauty. "Okay?"

"Okay."

Hyewon stared at the Angel, admiring him. She never got tired of looking at him. She liked knowing that he existed. Knowing that there was someone in the universe that made everything worth it.

"Thank you for existing with me," she told him as she cupped his face, gently, with one hand. He smiled and brushed her hair away from her face.

Desire. It was evident in their eyes. She drew him in, close, feeling his breath fan her nose.

"Kiss me."

Renjun's lips brushed against hers and he pulled away. He hesitated– not in the way that a person did when they were scared or unsure. But in a way that would prolong the moment, the long-anticipated kiss, and make it even more special.

He looked into her eyes once more as if asking for permission. She had already given it to him and the gleam in her eyes couldn't make it any more obvious. Ever so slowly, Renjun leaned in and pressed his lips against hers.

A delicate, soft-lipped kiss. He was always gentle with her, careful as if she was made of glass. But gentleness wasn't what she wanted, not now, not after all this time away from him. And so she weaved her fingers in his hair and pulled him closer. He groaned softly and encircled his arms around her. His body against hers as he laid her down on the bed, holding her head as he placed it on his pillow.

The angel pulled away and as if on instinct the demon pursued his retracting lips but didn't find them. Her half-closed eyes were now wide open. She looked up at him, confused, "What?"

Renjun smiled and shook his head. He kissed her again. This time harder. The way she wanted. His thumb caressed her cheek, rubbing up and down while her arms were wrapped securely around his neck.

Driven with longing, lust, and love, heaven and hell collided. At that moment, there was no demon, and neither was there an angel. They almost felt human, with feelings that drove each other mad and caused their hearts to palpitate violently in their chests.

They experienced their own little world. In which they existed and nothing was forbidden.

Not even love.

i suck at writing intimate scenes