When it rains in the desert

Rory

"Celia" I said pulling her out of her trance, forcing her to look at me. " This isn't your fault " she nodded back at me but I could tell she didn't believe me. She wiped her eyes and resumed her story.

"Rick had a daughter, 4 years ago" Her eyebrows were furrowed when she told me, as though she was forcing a memory to stay back. She looked back up at the ceiling, blocking the tears from slipping out. "Rick didn't know who her mother was, I don't think he could remember but she wasn't part of the picture. Me and Carter practically raised her when we weren't on Assignments or at University." She paused for a second too long and looked at me with pain now in her eyes. It was so visible.

"You're going to think i'm a horrible person." she whispered, not able to make eye contact.

"Celia, you could shoot me and I wouldn't think you were a horrible person." I looked at her to find her staring back at me and smiled at her. just a small one, not only to her but to myself, because I knew it was true. I knew that if she had walked into my apartment yesterday with her gun leveled at my chest and shot me, I would still love her. I would still defend her until the day I died.

It was going to be bad, I could tell before she told me, I could see it in the way she was concentrating, she was trying to find the right words, but her eyes. They looked like someone had stripped all the sadness from the world and put them in her eyes. She picked at her finger nails, let out a breath and then, quietly, so quietly she said it. Almost whispered it.

"i had her kidnapped"

It took me a moment to comprehend what she was saying. I searched her eyes for any signs of a lie, a cruel joke but there was none. She just looked sad. so sad. I tried to open my mouth, to ask her what she meant, to ask her if i'd heard her wrong, if my ears were playing tricks on me. But they were sealed, they wouldn't move. She saw me hesitate, question my trust in her and answered.

" let me explain okay" I nodded because that was all I could do. " I couldn't leave her, I knew what it was like to be trapped in business with Rick , He never beat us like our parents did." She turned her head as though she was trying to suppress the memory "No" she was shaking her head. "No, he was worse" She looked back at me and let out a shaky breath."He would lock us up, literally."

"For days, he'd just take us down to the lowest floor of the compound into a room and lock us up. Depending on the mistakes we'd made, no food or showers or water just lock us up." She picked up her water and took a sip. She placed it back down and carried on "

"Rick never cared about her, not ever. I could see that he was already thinking of ways he could use her when she'd grow up. I knew that if I was planning on leaving I had to take her with me." She stopped again, taking another long breath.

She shrugged her shoulder, "I didn't know what else to do, Rick
would've suspected that she was with me."

A tear this time, rolled down her cheek. "I would've raised her on my own, here. We would've been happy"

I finally found my voice. "What happened?" Even though we were the only two here, we both found ourselves whispering. Afraid of speaking to loud, of someone over hearing.

" I knew that there was chance Rick would find me and I wanted to make sure that there was no chance of him finding her. She's so pure Jacob. So beautiful. She deserved a chance at a normal life."

"Working with my uncle, I'd met some dodgy people. I had this friend who could smuggle her out of the country and place her in the the care of a family."

She shrugged her shoulders and I sighed, in relief. I could see now that she'd done it for the girls safety and I felt a swell of pride in my chest.

"It wasn't safe for me to know her new name or location, but he sends me pictures of her, so that I know she's safe. every month I get a new photo and it is the best part of my month. But then I delete it." I tilted my head, questioning it. She  laughed and at first i thought it was at my stupidity but then I realised it was at hers. "When people see things they don't understand, the ask questions and I can't lie about her."

She took in a breath and finally let the tears spill out of her eyes. I moved closer to her and let her climb into my chest. She was still holding back though, the only sign she was crying was silent shiver she let out and the odd one or two sniffles. "Her name was Emory, we called her Rory" she whispered into my chest.

We sat on the couch for what seemed like forever until she was ready to move, she said she needed a shower and I let her go and went out to get us both some lunch.