When it rains in the desert

Comfort food

I got home and heard the shower running. I placed the food on the counter, I'd gotten pizza, comfort food. I'd put a towel in the dryer before i'd left do that when she got out of the shower, she could be warm, I went to go grab it and put it in the bathroom for her but before I knocked I heard something, she was sobbing. But it was different, i'd never heard anything like it. She was crying, like she'd fully let herself break down and it broke my heart. I opened the door and immediately was hit by a gust of steam and warmth. I walked past the sink and pulled back the curtain, slowly. She was curled up, her knees had been pulled up to her chest and her head was laying on her knees. Her bandages had been soaked but she didn't seem to care. I wanted to take her pain away, all of it.

In the absence of that ability I did the next best thing. I lifted my leg into the tub and then the other, I sat down in front of her, letting the scorching water hit my back, drenching my clothes. She slowly lifted her head and I couldn't peel myself away from her eyes. Beautiful green eyes colored red and at this point I couldn't tell which drops were hers and which had fallen from the shower but the sight of her made my heart ache. I opened my arms and dropped my legs so they were at her side and she crawled into me. Hugging me, nuzzling her head into my neck and holding on for dear life.

"Hey, Ceils, it's okay baby." I was rocking us back and forward. "Shh baby its okay" I said against her hair, but she just cried more, letting out sobs I hoped I would never hear again. I wanted to kill whoever had made her feel this way. I wanted to make them suffer. I mean I couldn't bear to just listen to her cries, I couldn't imagine what she'd gone through. I couldn't believe how incredibly strong she was. She'd lost her brother, and the closest thing she'd had to a daughter, in the same week. Not to mention everything before that.

She moved her head so I could hear her speak. "I'm sorry Jacob." I shook my head against her hair. "I'm sorry for everything" I didn't understand how she was worrying about me right now.

"Hey" I pulled her back so she could look at me. "You never have to be sorry to me, ever" She didn't respond, she just placed her head back into my shoulder. I ran my ringers up and down her back, trying to calm her down and when the crying slowed down a little I grabbed the shampoo from behind me and poured some into my hand. I didn't know if she was in the right state to do this herself right now. She felt me moving and sat up again in front of me. I smiled at her and began massaging the shampoo through her hair, making sure it was getting everywhere and then I washed it out. She looked at me as I began to grab the shower gel and cleaned the rest of her body. Slowly lifting up her arms and then moving down from her back to her legs.

She stopped me and put her fingers under my chin to lift it up so I was looking at her. I hadn't kissed her lips in months, I felt like I was being deprived of oxygen, I needed to feel the weight of her lips on mine and whilst I was trying to remember what it felt like she reminded me.

She slowly pressed her lips into mine, the movement was quick but the sensation was soft. At first i hesitated but after a second I put my hand on her neck and hers found their place into my hair, it was like they'd never left. She moved back an inch before taking a breath and replacing her lips back on to mine. It ended too soon and when she pulled away we sat, pressing our foreheads together. We were silent for a moment too long before I turned off the shower and lifted her up. I got out first and passed her the towel I had meant to give her when I came in and she took it with a smile.

I didn't understand what was happening but I couldn't ask her, I didn't know how, not when I knew what she had going on right now. I gave her some clothes to change into and waited for her to join me in the kitchen. Her bandages had gotten wet in the shower so I gave her new ones and helped her. We sat in at the kitchen counter for a moment eating our pizza in silence when I asked "What happened after you got to the warehouse?"

She finished chewing her slice and then said, " Rick didn't like that i'd taken something of his from right under his nose, he never actually cared about Rory but the fact that i'd outsmarted him really pissed him off and he was hell bent of getting her back." she took another slice of pizza and finished it before carrying on. "When I got there I obviously couldn't tell him where she was because I didn't know so his solution was to beat the crap out of me instead."

"At first he gave me the benefit  of the doubt, he gave me a chance to track down who my contact was but I told him it would take a month or two because he wasn't in the country right now. I obviously had no intention of tracking him down but it bought me a couple of months, until he realized I was just stalling to escape again." She poured herself some water and gulped the whole thing down I was right to assume she hadn't eaten or drank properly in weeks.

"Rick always had no patience so when he found out, he shot me." I looked at her  at the way she came out and said it. Just sort of blurted it out with no warning. He shot me. She looked at me and saw my shock. "That was what Rick did though, he lost his temper, I barely even had time to register what had happened."

"From what I can remember Maggie took me to the hospital but then decided against it before we got inside. I don't remember how I got here, i'm pretty sure i'd passed out from the blood but I think he gave me something to keep me asleep. I woke up being dragged into the elevator." She sighed again and shrugged her shoulders.

"He just told me that yours was the apartment at the end. I don't know how he knew but that's what happened."