Magtatanghaling-tapat na at kanina pa tahimik sa buong condo. Kanina pa tumigil si Max sa pagwawala sa kabilang kwarto pero nanatili si Mia na nakikiramdam sa paligid habang nakahilata sa kama. Nahimasmasan na siya sa mga nangyari kaninang umaga. Humupa na rin ang kanyang kaba at takot. Ngayon nga ay pinagsisisihan niya ang ginawang pag-iwan kay Max. Kailangan nilang mag-usap para ayusin ang gusot na 'to.
She washed her hands over her face and blew out a breath before crawling out of bed. Walang ingay siyang lumabas sa kwarto at dumeretso sa sala. Akala niya'y umalis si Max kanina nang tumahimik ang condo pero halos mapatalon siya sa gulat nang madatnan itong nakaupo sa may sofa. Nakasapo ang dalawang kamay sa ulo nito habang nakatukod ang mga siko sa mga tuhod nito. Agad siya nitong napansin at muling bumadha ang sakit sa mga mata nito nang mahalatang gulat na gulat siya sa presensya nito.
"Would you prefer me to leave now?", sarkastiko nitong tanong sabay tayo.
"N-no!", natatarantang pigil niya dito. "Let's talk, please."
Umupo siya sa katapat nitong upuan saka pinagsalikop ang mga kamay sa kanyang kandungan. Alanganing bumalik si Max sa pagkakaupo sa sofa kaharap niya. She cleared her throat to break the awkward silence between them.
"About sa nangyari kanina -"
"I can't take it anymore", sansala nito sa sasabihin niya.
"W-what do you mean?", kinakabahan niyang tanong.
"I hate seeing you die each day because of me. I can see so much fire in you, Mia. But the ice inside my soul is slowly dampening that fire", tila nasasaktan nitong wika. Kita sa mukha nito ang paghihirap nitong sabihin 'yon.
"Are you breaking up with me?", halos pabulong niyang tanong na para bang 'pag nilakasan niya ang pagkakatanong ay magkakatotoo 'yon.
"Can't you see how toxic our relationship is becoming?"
"As you said, we're in a relationship. You can't just decide to end it on your own. And I can't accept what you're saying."
"I am toxic. You don't deserve someone like me!", pagalit nitong sabi sabay tayo mula sa sofa palayo sa kanya. Agad siyang sumunod dito papunta sa may pintuan.
Her mind refused to believe what he's saying. No. He is everything that her soul needed.
"We can get through this together."
Max shook his head at her.
"We can take therapies together if that's what we need", nagsusumamo niyang suhestiyon.
"No. There are things that are just better done on our own."
Mia shook her head furiously. She can't understand why he's saying that. This is insane. They're a team now. How could they overcome something if they're not fighting as one?
She has a lot to say yet she can't utter one single word. Instead, she gripped his shirt and buried her face in his chest. Her tongue felt so thick and her throat is closing up. She found it hard to breath as tears came rushing down her cheeks wetting his shirt.
"Please", was all she can say.
Max hands went up her cheeks and pulled her face away. She can make out his eyes through her tear-stricken, blurry vision. They were red with tears. And the pain in them mirrored hers. Why are they hurting each other?
"I love you, you know."
"Then why are you breaking up with me?"
Max closed his eyes as a single tear scaped his left eye and trailed down his face. Idinikit nito ang noo sa kanya.
"Max, please." She couldn't care less if her voice quivered or if she's choking with sobs as tear after tear fell down from her eyes. Her hands trembled as she tightened her hold on his shirt. She cant accept what is happening.
"Please, stay. D-don't leave me."
More tears rolled down his face as he shook his head. She can see how hard he's trying to subdue his cries but his shoulders rocked with sobs. And she can feel deep in her gut that this is final. This is the end of it. But she refused to believe it. Something as wonderful as their love can't possibly just end this way.
She clutched her arms around his waist tightly so he can't let go. If this is the only way to keep him here then she'll glue herself to his body. Her sobs are becoming hysterical as he tried to unclasp her hands behind him. If possible, she held him even tighter as she shook her head vehemently. Her body's trembling, her chest hurts so much.
"No!", she exclaimed as Max forcefully yanked her hands away. She then grasped his arm to stop him from walking away. But he just gripped her wrists in one hand as he pulled his arm away
"Please, Max!"
Max just shook his head and started walking toward the door. She ran after him and gripped his shirt from the back.
"Mia!", he yelled furiously as he swatted her hands away and turned around to face her. She winced when she saw the anger in his eyes.
"Tama na, please. Wag mo ng pahirap ang sarili mo."
"No. Max, please. Don't go. Ang sakit-sakit", iyak niya habang minamasahe ang sariling dibdib. Max eyes softened and more tears welled up. But unlike her, he succesfully stopped them from falling.
"I know. If I can just take away the pain, I will. But I'll just keep hurting you if I stay."
Max stepped back, away from her. He gripped the doorknob while still watching her cry. How can he watch her hurting and not do anything to comfort her?
"You know this is for the best, right?"
She shook her head slowly, refusing to accept the logic of it. Why is he leaving? Why is he leaving?
"Stay here if you must. This is yours as much as mine."
Max nodded his head goodbye then walked out the door. Walked out of her life. For good. She held her arms around her, clutching her stomach. Her chest hurts but something in her gut is burning. Something's starting to dig up a hole in there.
She squatted down and hugged herself tighter. She rocked back and forth until she can't take it anymore and layed down the floor sobbing. She clutched her middle tighter as she curled up into a ball. The hole in her gut is becoming bigger and bigger. It has to stop. Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop...
*** The END ***
BINABASA MO ANG
Working Girls Series# 1: Beautiful Nightmare
RomanceMia Catherine Cordova considered herself successful in her career but something wasn't right with her life. She felt lost and empty inside. Madalas niyang maisip ang magpakamatay nalang para matapos na ang lahat ng kahungkagang nararamdaman niya. Ng...