Across The Stars - A Kai Havertz Fanfiction

Chapter 37 - Closeness

Whilst Kai runs us a fabulous hot bath I get some hair mask from the little cupboard where I have all my stuff. I enter the bathroom and want to start applying the mask but Kai doesn't let me. He takes the little package out of my hand and turns me around before opening the mask and applying it to my hair. He really massages it into it and I totally enjoy it. The gently movements of his hands just feel too good.

"Good like that?", Kai asks before kissing my cheek. I nod slightly, turn my head a little and whisper: "Yes. Perfect thanks babe." against his lips before kissing him. Our lips move in perfect sync and every cell of my body burns in love. This man and his love and care just are the best thing I've ever had in my life.

Kai gives me his hand and supports me whilst I'm getting in his bathtub, then he sits down behind me, wrapping his warm, muscular arms around me and pulling me against his chest. I sigh happily and totally relax in the hot water and his warm hug. Kai feathers soft kisses on my cheek, my neck and my shoulder and I just really enjoy it. I feel so very loved and safe in Kai's arms. The way he holds me, looks at me, touches me and kisses me, the way he talks to me... Just fantastic. I've never felt that way before and I really don't want the feeling to end, never.

Whilst we're lying in the water Kai draws circles on my belly with his fingertips. Then he suddenly whispers: "Gigi?" which I answer to with: "Yeah?" "I have a question. You're basically here all the time and pretty much never in your own apartment and... I thought... Maybe you'd like to move in with me? Right now you're basically wasting money for an apartment that you're never in and that you never really liked and yeah... I just thought you'd like to live here with me.", Kai says whilst kissing my forehead. I smile and respond: "On the one hand I'd love to live with you but... Sometimes I just need some time and space to myself in my own room and I don't know how I could continue taking that time and space."

Kai nods, he seems to understand, and then suggests: "Well... My family is barely here with all of them, mostly it's either my parents or my siblings and therefore I don't really need two guest rooms. We could turn one of them into your room and when my whole family is here you would have to give it up for a few days but then you would have it back. And to be honest I only took this apartment because it was easy to get, in a good part of the city and so I could move out of the hotel. I actually wanted to move into a house in summer already but I didn't find the perfect one. But I have continued searching and there actually are a few houses that would be perfect for the two of us in Ben's neighbourhood. We could maybe visit those houses and if we like one of them we could move in there next summer, hm? Then you could have a room to yourself, always." I smile and answer: "That sounds wonderful but... I can't afford living in a house Kai, and I don't want you to pay everything for me as if I am a useless, poor piece of shit. In this apartment I could at least afford like a third of the rent but a house...", sounding a little sad. My boyfriend looks me in the eyes and whispers: "Babe, you aren't a poor, useless piece of shit. Definitely not. And I know that you aren't using me for my money. I just... I want to live with you, Gigi. Really live with you. I wanna build a home with you that isn't 'Kai's apartment with some of Gigi's stuff'. I wanna build one where we both feel home from the beginning, where we both have our stuff, that we both created. I mean... I would move into a house anyway but moving into one with you and really making it our home that we both build together would be perfect. I mean... You are my home person, my emotional home. Why not also creating a place that makes this feeling of being home even better? A place where we're both free and happy and have some privacy. And also it's only a few streets away from Bernd and Sophie's new home where they will move after its renovation last summer. Then you would have a friend living close to you which I think would be wonderful for you. You don't have to decide now but please think about it and at least visit some of the houses with me when quarantine is over."

All these things make sense but the financial thing is still feeling bad for me. "I don't know but I will think about it. But I am about 70% sure that I will move in here with you. The house thing... I'll think about it. And now let's cuddle and talk about a topic that doesn't give me anxiety, okay?", I say and Kai nods, nothing but love and softness in his eyes. We change the topic and start talking about our favourite memories from our different holidays and again I totally relax, feeling as if I was in a bubble of love and intimacy.