Saviors ; 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘥

077. ꕥ Moving On

~twenty-six days since mount weather~

It had been a little less than a month since the battle at the Mountain — a little less than a month since Clarke Griffin had left. A newly re-named Arkadia had been striving to build a life on the ground, one without war or fights every day. There hasn't been a Grounder attack since Mount Weather, there was a cease-fire Lexa had ordered a couple of days after the battle, and the people of Arkadia were starting to think that this might be real peace.

I was one of those people that thought this. Despite what we have all been through — despite what I've been through, there was hope that we may be able to have peace. That's all I wanted, peace. Peace with Bellamy would be a dream come true; to live every day together, not having the thought of battle lingering over our heads seemed incredible.

Now, I'd be the first to admit that the first couple of weeks weren't looking the greatest to begin with. Every time I saw Bellamy — which was becoming more often — it looked like he had this gray cloud hanging over his head. It was guilt, and I knew that — guilt for what had gone down at Mount Weather. By now, I was given the details of what had happened, but not by Bellamy; he still refuses to talk about it, which I completely understand; it was Monty who told me what had happened. He told me that they had no choice and that if they didn't do what they did, every one of us would've been killed. He told me that through the cameras, Bellamy saw me on the table, and he had also seen Octavia and Maya getting caught by the guards. — They had no choice, and I understood that; I understood why.

What I didn't understand was why Clarke had left. I haven't gotten the full story of what had happened because Bellamy was the last one to see her. All I knew was she left — she left everyone. I didn't know the whole story, so I couldn't be that mad at Clarke for leaving, but there's still a part of me that was. The part of me that asks: Why would Clarke leave Bellamy to deal with the guilt on his own? I was a first-hand witness to see that guilt drag him down, and it pained me to see him deal with that essentially on his own. Yeah, I tried to help, but I could only do so much because I wasn't there when it happened.

But as I said, those were the first two weeks. It was getting better now; slowly but surely, people were flourishing — those included Bellamy and me. Our relationship has developed, and I can safely say that my room is not my own anymore. Everyone was doing good, or as good as they could be. There was only one exception.

Jasper Jordan.

The death of Maya Vie broke him. He and Maya had started something in Mount Weather, and from what Monty said, Jasper seemed happy when he was around her. That was until level five was irritated, killing everyone, including Maya.

Unlike everyone else, Jasper had been spiraling down instead of up. If you didn't see it, you were considered blind — everyone knew. Jasper didn't try to hide it either; he would drink out in the open and go on about what went down and how it shouldn't have happened and that he was going to save everyone. He's been doing that a lot lately — drinking. He's also dismissed anyone that's tried to help him, even Monty.

It hurt to see Jasper in such a low place since just a couple of months ago; he was this optimistic boy that had the biggest heart. I missed the old Jasper. Now... that's not who he is, and it's hard to watch him turn into someone else.

It was later in the day, the sun just about ready to set, when I found Jasper sat down with his back leaning against a stump of a tree that had fallen, his hair had grown long, which now covered most of his face. His legs were pulled to his chest with earbuds in his ears, the cord leading to a small music player that had once been Maya's. He stared out past the wired fence and into the abyss that was the forest, and I could only imagine what was going on in his head. When I approached him, I wasn't even sure if he knew I was there because he didn't move at all. He only glanced in my direction when I decided to sit next to him, my legs crossed beneath me as my hands fell into my lap.