Saviors ; 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘥

131. ꕥ After The World Ends

No one was coming back to the Second Dawn Bunker — not Bellamy, not John, nobody. Bellamy and my brother, along with Clarke, Harper, Monty, Raven, and Emori, all were not returning. It was a devastating revelation that some of my closest friends and brother would not be in the Second Dawn Bunker during Praimfaya. Their plan was to go to space in the rocket Raven had found in Becca's lab and live on the Go-Sci Ring of the Ark that was left when the remaining Skaikru came down. It was an insane idea, to say the least, but I expected nothing less from Raven Reyes. Only to add to the absurdity of the plan, there wasn't enough fuel to get them down, yet that was a problem to worry about during the next five years.

After I had been with Miller for over an hour, comforting him as best I could for the loss of his Father, Kane found me informing me that my brother was on the radio. The older man shared very few details as I departed from Miller about what was going on; to every question I asked, he just gave one-word answers. My questions were answered, however, when I made it into the office where the radio was located, passing by Octavia, who stood outside and gave me an expression I couldn't quite decipher and spoke with my brother. In great John Murphy fashion, my brother explained the whole chaotic plan of the seven returning to the Ark.

"I can't believe you're going back to the Ark." I breathed through sheer astonishment; the radio grasped tightly in my hand with my thumb pressing hard on the button, allowing me to talk through it.

Warm tears glistened across my eyes, shining in the fluorescent lights as I stared ahead at the door before my eyes cast around the empty, dull room. To hear they were going to space was amazing and terrifying all at the same time — so many things could go wrong, making it to where they wouldn't survive this trip. The odds were not in their favor.

"Tell me about it." John mused from the other side, suppressing a chuckle through the static. "It's a bat shit crazy idea if you ask me."

"Sounds like your kind of plan." I laughed shortly, my head nodding along.

"Hardly." He boasted, and I could only smile at the face I imagined he was making on the other side of this radio.

There was a beat of silence, and the banter-filled aspect dissipated, turning into a painstakingly filled silence that was broken when I spoke, my voice cracking with each syllable. "This will be the longest we're apart. Five years, that's a long time."

"I know." John responded despondently. "But we'll be fine. It's tough to say this, you know, given that we've spent our whole damn lives together, but we don't need each other anymore, Jo."

I sniffled, wiping the tears that found their way gliding down my face. "I don't know, John. I—"

"Jo, stop. You haven't needed me for a long time. That's a good thing, though. You don't need anyone. You can take care of yourself. You're a badass."

We shared a laugh at John's last remark, tears slowing down my face as I kept the smile on it, something I didn't think would be possible after what had happened. It was refreshing to have the familiar action taking over my features, an added bonus being it was with my brother.

John's words reminded me of what he said in the letter months ago after he'd left with Jaha in search of The City of Light. Just like he had done a few moments ago, he assured me that we didn't need each other anymore, and it made me wonder if that was what he was referring to when he said that we hadn't needed each other for a long time. In the letter, John said he'd always be here for me one way or another; I knew that still held true even if he didn't say it.

"John, I don't know if I'm going to be able to raise this child by myself. I have no idea what I'm doing. I mean, what if I drop them on their head, and they turn out just like you?" Despite my joking mannerism, the fears that I would be an absolutely terrible parent were very much real, and they kept wanting to divulge further into my brain.