Lost in You

Chapter 25

I wouldn't admit it, not after he said that I shouldn't worry about how we're using the last day, but I couldn't sleep after everything that happened, the thoughts spinning in my head. Until I came up with an idea that I couldn't wait to present to Maja in the morning. I don't think she was awake enough to be a good judge when I told her, but I had already made up my mind, so a grumbled agreement was all I needed before I left. Now I sit in the lobby, chatting with Sophie when Marius exits the lift, wearing skiing clothes like I instructed him to and grinning at me. "I knew we'd go back to this," he says and points to the skis that lean against the reception desk next to me. "Had you told me a few weeks ago, I wouldn't have believed you. But I did have a few hours with Maja that we used to practice what you've taught me and I thought it would be a shame if you left without seeing it," I explain and pick up my skis, thanking Sophie once again for getting them for me. She waves it away. "Have fun and don't hurt yourselves," she says when we leave the hotel. The air outside is still cold, our breath clouding around us while we put on the skis. When I push into the track, I notice that I'm not at all nervous anymore. Not about the fact that there are skis on my feet and I might not be able to control them, nor about the fact that Marius is right behind me, watching what I'm doing. I beam at him, even if he can't have an idea why. "Ready?" I ask. "Yes. Same route as last time?" I nod. "I don't know any other if we don't want to risk getting lost." I still haven't told him that last time had already been a close call. He stops next to me and straightens his head while I take another deep breath of the crisp air. Then we start at the same time without another word needed. The hotel grows steadily smaller behind us and early as we are on a weekday, the tracks are nearly unused and empty. Over the past weeks, I've come to love the sounds of the skis rushing through the fresh snow, the birds twittering in the distance and the steady beat of my heart, even longed for them when I wasn't here. "You really have gotten better," Marius says after a while when giving me side-glance. I smile at the compliment. "Thanks. I never thought I would like it this much," I say and even if his mouth is hidden by a shawl, I'm sure he smiles as well. "I can't imagine not knowing how to ski," he admits. "There isn't much of a possibility to go skiing in nature like this in Munich," I say. "So you grew up there?" "In the suburbs, so we were able to get into nature on a short drive when I was little, but still, it required that much. And when I could have started to drive myself, I moved into the city to study. After that, Maja and I haven't done much more than focus on studying and exploring our new home," I say. "And do you like it?" I give myself a little push to get over a small hill before I answer. "Yes and no. Sometimes I long back to the quieter environment of my parents' house, but most of the time I enjoy my time with Maja in the city. I don't know if I'd want to live like that my whole life, but for now, it's fun and perfect for what we need." "How long would you still study?" His tone has become more serious, like he's still thinking about our conversation last night. Like he's also spent the night thinking about it like I did. "Another year, if everything goes well," I say. It sounds terribly long and frighteningly short at the same time, depending on what I focus on. He seems to take a moment to think about my answer. "And then?" "I'm not sure yet. I was hoping that the internship I have in May will help me with that," I admit. I wait for him to say more, to tell me that he's asking because he wants me to move closer to him, but he only nods slowly, then grins at me like our conversation never happened and speeds up, just enough that I can't keep up and shout after him to wait which he responds to with laughing. "Should I teach you how to go faster as well?" he teases when I've finally caught up with him. "First you teach me how to break and then you want me to go faster?" I pant and then add, "I don't think my technique is the only thing that stops me from being faster by the way," I say and push a strand of hair off my forehead. "But it could make it easier," he says. I sigh because I already know what will come next and that he won't stop talking about it if I don't agree. "Fine, show me some of your tricks," I give in. He smiles like I just gave him a present and the rest of the way to the last view is spent with me trying out everything he tells me to. I won't admit it to him, but it's actually fun and I'm surprised when we ascend the hill to the last viewpoint. The way seemed shorter than ever. "Now look, last time Maja and I only fell once. But that was on several tries for me," I say and eagerly push towards the descend on the other side of the hill, but he stops me. "You're missing the view," he teases, I roll my eyes and stop to look around. When he bends down and kisses me, I am so taken by surprise, I almost lose balance on my skis and spend the kiss with one hand digging into his shoulder and the other still on my ski-pole because I don't trust myself enough to let go. Not the most elegant one, but the smile he gives me when he straightens makes up for it. "You would have missed that as well." "You could have warned me. The only thing I almost missed was landing in the snow face first," I say, but my voice is gentle and I can't help but smile at him. "You weren't really falling. I caught you," he says and I laugh at the utter confidence in his voice. "Can I go now?" I ask which makes him laugh as well. "Only because you won't shut up about it." After me bragging so much about training with Maja, I'm very glad that I really made it to the foot of the hill more or less elegant and without falling. I get a round of applause and a kiss for my efforts which more than rewards for the troubles I had the days before, climbing up the hill over and over again, first to learn myself and then to help Maja as well. "Do you think we could get something to eat when we're back or do you have to go back to work?" he asks when we're on the way back home. "No I think that should be fine. It's not even noon yet," I say with a look at my watch, still glad that I found someone to swap shifts with on so short notice. I push the thought of work aside and feel a smile grow wider on my face. For a moment, everything seems perfect. Like for a few hours we made it to paradise with sugar coated mountains, a cerulean sky and my heart skipping a beat every time I glance towards who I'm with. I don't dare to tell him though, scared it might sound too cliché once spoken aloud. "I'm glad you could stay another day," is all I say instead. He only smiles at me in response and it's all I need anyway.