Nights in the Studio - Taejoon

11

Taehyung's POV

"What's going on?"

I looked at my hands after completely separating from Jimin's chest, I rolled up my sleeves and wiped my lips still wet from the remains of the kiss we had just given. I don't know when it became a habit but now we kiss every time we're alone in his room; ever since the night he decided to help me he's been... different.

From the morning after that offer: I got up with his hand on my waist, under him, and with his lips on mine. He whispered good morning to me and then left, leaving my toy body in the middle of his soft bed and gray sheets. I watched as he got up to the bathroom, took off the shirt he had slept in, and carefully washed his face.

His body bending majestically as the water trickled down his tall shoulders, I imagined him on top of me again. I swallowed hard, and he noticed: he looked me in the eyes at that moment and after a mocking smile, he went back to the bed until he took my hands; I, like a refugee, followed him and his light to the bathroom. He closed the door.

Then his hands, sniffing my body between my frightened sighs. He asked if he could actually touch me, and I said no. Then he just rested his chin on my shoulder and hugged me. I asked him to go slowly.

Jimin knows how to respect other people's wishes very well.

I'd say too well.

No, that's how it should be: with us kissing at the tip of dawn and dusk; between the blankets embraced with the shyness between us; His glances at me whenever we're not alone and his brushes on purpose with my butt when he sleeps next to me.

He's not gay, but he still feels how much he loves me...and that he wants me. I would be lying if I said I don't too.

But still nothing has happened

I wouldn't say that. The mere fact of kissing a man makes my senses explode, as if he belonged to this space of stigmatized intimacies; somehow I feel safe from the world, which is now always full of... him.

Namjoon

How I would like to yell at him to leave me alone every time he tries to stay with me or talk to me when the others are not around. Every time I see him peeking when Jimin holds me from behind while doing the dishes or when we interlock our legs on the couch while watching TV. I know that the others suspect too but this, the fact that he is the most interested in all this, makes me put myself in the place of some kind of liar; Almost as if I were unfaithful, I lower my head every time I'm with him or someone mentions him.But I'm not even hurting him.

"Nothing."

"I wouldn't say it's nothing," Jimin grabs my chin with his right hand while he caresses my hand with his left. "do you still think about that?"

"You must understand me Jimin... all this, what we do," I saw his eyes and a shine crossed them. "all to stop thinking about...and now, now I'll have to see him." A little silence. My head is in disarray. I still don't believe that I will debut, it's a known but unruly feeling inside me; that until I remember that I can't do it if I'm not with him. It seems like a punishment.

Suddenly a wet kiss moistens my mind again, I close my eyes. It is a slow and calm dance, the breaths are held. I feel how his hands get tangled in my hair; I dare and take mine to Jimin's neck, I bring him closer to me. To protect me from wanting.

The lack of air separates us, I rest my forehead on his. "Do you want me to go with you?" I meet his captivating eyes. I remember my own shortcomings. "I can do it if you ask...we can even do it as a collaboration, so nobody suspects." I smile.