Nights in the Studio - Taejoon

34

Taehyung's POV

I swing my legs out of what's supposed to be the stage area, just in time for Yoongi to take on the next verse. My breath quickens with every little memory focused on not screwing up the last rehearsal before confirming the musical show.

I turn to where Jimin is, not paying attention to me, just waiting for his signal like everyone else, who doesn't bother to look at me either. I don't know why I expect it to be any different than the last three days.

Everyone has decided to leave the questions and judgments until after the promotion period even though Jin strongly disagreed; but I guess it's because it's what's best for the team. On the other hand, I hadn't been hurt in any visible areas, so my break was finally over.

However, I still have pain inside. I have tried to take them off while hugging my tiger every night, but my head is puzzled between the two people and memories of that night. I can't help but wonder what Jimin thinks, why he would have done something like that.

No matter how hard I try, I can't find a reason. A part of me tells me that it's my fault, but that is dying; I feel that I am no longer the same person, that I have support... even though I don't talk to anyone about what happened, and I swallow my words. So, it is my other side that reflects from the first kiss between the two, from my intention in that shower, the culprits seem to fall apart.

There are too many gray areas for my shades.

My cue comes as my mind is busy and I join the others to finish the chorus part and the end of the song, jump to the seats and we choreograph the tables surprisingly well before ending up sitting down with heavy breaths. At that moment the music stops and a conspiratorial applause against our tiredness is heard.

The choreographer proudly watches us get off the platform and run to throw ourselves on the ground. Hoseok goes with him to monitor but I don't have the energy, so I just close my eyes feeling how everyone is going to accompany him to the monitor.

"Oh, everything looks better...the timing was fine." I hear Jungkook mention in a whisper and the others nodding with little fluffy ones.

"Taehyung-ah!" Hobi calls out to me, and I open my eyes and look at him, he motions for me to come closer. I get up and go in silence, I approach between Namjoon and Jimin without crossing touches and ask what happens "at the end of the chorus you turn your arms to the opposite side," I look at the recording instantly realizing my mistake and sigh, I almost feel a weight on my back before Hobi tells me "calm down, come I'll help you."

With that said, we both walk away to the mirror, I watch as he moves and counts and I try to follow him, brushing my hair from my face from time to time so I can see better. But I didn't bring anything to hold it down, and it keeps falling on my forehead every time I try to copy the wrist flip, so Hobi walks over to me, stopping dancing.

"I'm sorry Hobi." I say and he smiles, brushing my hair off my face with his hands.

"Okay Tae, you just have to tie your hair up before you end up tripping." He responds with a laugh before untying one of his two pigtails, pulling himself into a single ponytail and pulling the hair tie through my hair, ending in a ridiculous bun in the middle of my skull. "Cute." I look at him smile, then turn to the mirror to do it again, only for my blood to run cold as a hateful glare from Jimin pierces through the mirror into my body and then Hoseok's in a move as swift as it is deadly.

I have no choice but to avoid his eyes and concentrate again; This is already a recurring thing that scares me: every time someone talks to me or touches me a little or smiles at them... Jimin's face was always in the background, the comment when I walked past him, and he'd called me 'easy' or a 'traitor'.

It's so infuriating that sometimes it makes me want to yell at him to leave me alone, but no, because we're in a cold war. Duties have tied me, as well as him, to the conformity of seeing each other every day without solving absolutely anything.

I turn to try to say something to him and shut my mind, but just then the front door opens with a bang and a friendly "Hello!" with the voice of Bang PD; We all approach with our heads down. We don't feel like talking right now.

"Hello." We all respond in unison.

"Hello, hello everyone, I'm glad to see you. I don't want to take up your time, I'm just here to know if you're ready for the presentations." He explains and we look at each other nodding without further comment "Well, well...also ehm," he turns for a moment to the door where one of the administrative workers is carrying several folders, he hands PD-nim one in particular and he looks at it before to turn to us "also about Taehyung's mixtape...I need to have the tracks ready to send to marketing."

"They are ready." Namjoon nods and I look at him reluctantly, before turning back to my boss.

"Yes, the copies have already been sent but, I suggest you do a quick review before your activities start and speaking of which:" he raised his voice and read "the musical shows are these two weeks, they have five interviews; later in the United States with various activities..." they all nodded in anticipation for the tour and his confirmation "we will see that later, but now I want to know if Taehyung is okay for all that."

I stay silent in my place staring at him, my hands tremble.

Am I doing better? I honestly don't know...but I guess I am: The pain has been long gone but now, what am I supposed to do with the remains of my uncertainty?

"He is feeling better." Jimin nods almost immediately with a smile, the rest of us watch in disbelief, including PD-nim, who stares at me for a moment.

And I think I know I can be for him no tot worry, so I smile widely and add an "I'm better."