Sun and Moon

A Note to the Past You - 4th February

This was written on post-shadow mercury retrograde period wherein I've realized so much about myself; like how great I am and why I don't need to compare myself to other women. It's a slow progress, and not a stable one. I know there will still be times that I'll go back to the dark but I hope you'll understand. I've written this to simply acknowledge your hurtings in the past and how I want to make you feel secured with me. I also want you to know how great I think of myself within this moment because of you.

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Dear Past You,

You're going to like someone. She's a friend. And you'll give in your efforts, patience, and time. But that won't be enough, and chances of rejection are high. That's alright. You can cry it out. You can vent out the pain. After all, men feeling pain is valid. You're young, you're going to find someone else.

You're going to like someone again. She's a friend of a friend. But your other friend likes you too. And this girl that you like will eventually confess how she likes another guy in your circle. This might be one of the most chaotic and painful moments you'll go through as you're not just about to ruin your loving self but also your connections. But that's alright. The good thing is that you'll settle this, not soon, but eventually. You'll move on and move forward.

You're going to like someone again—no, you're going to love someone. And she's a friend. She's a classmate. She's lovely, and she has goals that can be easily aligned with yours. But she's not available. But that's alright, she will be, just wait patiently. You don't have to do a thing because she'll come right at you, and this is going to shock you. Don't chase; I swear she likes you too. She's just focused on what needs to be prioritized right now.

She's gonna be unique as heck, she believes in astrology, she's spiritual, she can read tarot cards, she can manifest anything she wants, but aside from that, she's just as powerful. She's a leader, a friend, and a family. Her empathy and words of affirmation make her the softest yet most strong-willed woman in the room. She might not be as funny, her jokes can be a little cringe-worthy, but she can laugh at yours. Her smile and laugh will be one of the most addicting  things you'll see. She's talented too; she can write, she can sing, she can dance, and she can act; but when you meet her, she's gonna be too clueless about these things; you're gonna need to remind her consistently about these because she comes off too humble.

She can tap into your mind and heart, even if you don't want to but need to. She might be a little too slow at times but she can figure out just what you need most of those times and she's that; a listener. She will help fill the void onto your emptiness and she will nurture and take care of you. She will lovingly caress your cheeks and will let you lean on her chest when you're unwell.

Okay, but let's not just focus on the positive things about her. After all, everyone has their unpleasantness as a person. She thinks a lot, and she doesn't stop thinking, a lot. She can be insecure sometimes because she's needy. She easily cries even if you'll meet her with the first impression of courage and independence. She loves hard and chaotic; she needs stimulation every now and then.

But I promise you that when you meet this woman, she's gonna give you twice the love you're giving. She's gonna be faithful. Her attention and affection will be undivided, all them are yours. She's yours.

Sincerely,
She