Silent Love, Silent Pain [Levi x OC]

101. Paternity test

A few days had passed, all spent in Nathalie's lab. Although Sophie's physical condition was good and there was no more risk of her slipping back to coma, her mental condition was still fragile. Nonetheless, she regained some of her balance thanks to Levi who stayed by her side this entire time.

He was laying next to her, holding her in his arms and gently caressing her hair and back while she was napping. She's been through so much pain, he thought. It was like a ritual for him, at least once a day this thought occurred to him. He couldn't help but think that as it boiled blood inside of him to think about what Tyburs had done to her, that it might have resulted in...in pregnancy. He grimaced, it wasn't supposed to be like this. No, he was supposed to be the father of her children, no uncertainty about it. Why couldn't it be simple? Why couldn't they be just happy, without all of this drama surrounding them? Would they ever escape it? Would they ever be able to run far enough to not be found by the pain? Or was it just their destiny - to suffer as much as possible?

No, he won't accept that. He'll find a way to break this cycle of misery and build a peaceful life with her far away. It was something he promised himself for her and their relationship's sake. For his own sake. He got deep in his own thoughts, once again imagining the life he yearned for, when he felt how she moved in his arms. It was a sign for him that she was waking up.

When her eyes opened all notions vanished. It was a unique power like no other that she had over him - she could make him forget about everything - the good and the bad, and rather focus on what was in front of him, solely on her without additional thought to it. Just a general feeling of warmness when he looked into her emerald eyes, peace spilling all over his body, the unbeatable need to protect her and be one with her. Even after so many years spent together it was still hard to describe it properly, although he managed to understand it and characterise it better over the time.

"Levi?" The way her voice sounded, with a huge amount of insecurity in it, grabbed him by his heart and almost caused tears in his eyes. God, he was so soft these days, but how couldn't he? His wife was violated in imaginable ways, yet she still found strength inside her to call for him instead of screaming. Honestly, everyone expected her to scream after learning what they did to her.

"Right here," he cooed and kissed her forehead. He felt how her hands instinctively clutched more on his shirt as if she was afraid that letting go of this piece of clothing would mean she was letting go of him. "How are you feeling today?" Another ritual he developed over the last couple of days, a massive urge to ask her about her well-being, it was becoming obsessive at this point.

Another urge of his was to put his hands on her belly, sense the living being that was growing inside of her. Alas, it could trigger her. He knew she didn't want to be pregnant if there was even the tiniest possibility that someone else than Levi fathered it. He couldn't blame her. He was uneasy about the idea himself, but if she decided to keep it he would help her raise it like his own. It would be hard, yes. But staying away, turning his back on her and the potential child of hers would be harder.

"Fine," she mumbled, but he wasn't convinced. Especially that she loosened her grip and slowly turned on another side. Was it because she was fed up with the pregnancy and Nathalie slacking off with preparing the equipment to perform a safe abortion? Or was there more to her behaviour? Was there something else that she was worried about and couldn't talk about yet? Oh, the lack of knowledge was killing him, yet he couldn't confront her about it. Not right now. She suffered a lot, it would be completely insensitive of him to dwell on a subject.

"You wanna eat?" He asked, changing the subject and hoping it would improve her mood, but she just shook her head which almost caused him to sigh. It seemed like she was eating less than before. Was it her trauma interfering with her habits or was she consciously trying to harm herself in order to fasten the procedure? Was it because she didn't trust that Nathalie would help her remove the fetus? Why? She offered herself to help with it after all. There was no reason why she would stall it. "You have to eat," he reminded her and got up, ready to bring some food that Hange was cooking upstairs.