A Safe Place II SBI (on hiatus)

Chapter 26: Moving Forward

2 hours before Phil's meeting with Puffy:

Tommy watched as Phil left to the garage door. A reassuring smile was on Phil's face before he walked out and closed the door behind him.

The second he did, the knot in Tommy's stomach grew stiffer and tighter and he couldn't help but frown at the uncomfortable feeling.

The feeling he couldn't name turned his stomach. But why???

He didn't want Phil to go wherever he was going. He wanted Phil to stay with him. He needed Phil to be his anchor on this god-forsaken trip. The second Phil asked him if he was sure he would be okay with out him, his brain screamed at him to tell him, to beg him to stay. Everything in him was fighting with his mouth that didn't dare to open to tell Phil that he needed him and through it all, he said the total opposite of what he pleaded for in his mind with a smile.

Notch, he wished he said no. He wished he told Phil that he wasn't sure. He regrets not telling him.

God, wasn't he getting better? Why couldn't he say no?

you selfish brat!

Why was he so scared? Why didn't he tell them he was so uncertain about what he was doing? When did it all start...

That'll teach you for talking out of line. Hold that disgusting tongue of yours and zip it.

His father's voice...It's been a while since he's heard it in his mind yet it was as scary as ever. The detailed picture of blood on his hands, his father standing above his beaten limp self in his living room floor popped up on its own in his mind, probably resurfacing from his sheer panic seeping his bones and grasping his heart. A recognizable amount of panic...

It's what made his ears close out some of the noise that sounded like talking in the room he was in and made him quicken his snapping of the fidget toy in his hands over and over, letting the annoying *snap, snap, snap* echoe in the living room and not noticing his brothers- Techno and Wilbur becoming silent.

"To-my?"

The snaps continued vigorously as his eyes stared at the door the beach blonde left through that now looked like his old basement door that was dirty and scratched up, splotched with blood marks. The door that was also located in the living room of his childhood home...

His mind was puddled with so many pictures, memories so vivid, and whispers so quiet yet so recognizably dark that he couldn't dig himself out. He was being swallowed.

"Tom's" The hand on his shoulder brought him out of his random daze. He snapped his head up from his view of the garage door to the brunette eyes of Wilbur who was right in front of him now, kneeling in front of the boy.

Since when was Wilbur in front of his view of the door?

"Sunshine, you okay?" Wilbur said softly as he brought his hand gently on the boy's cheek. You could just hear the slight worry shake out from his tone. To the side of the brunette, Techno was standing there, staring with utter worry and concern lacing his expression.

okay, It was an understatement to say that Wilbur and Techno weren't aware of Tommy's anxiety.

They've been prepping for it since they figured they were going to take a small trip without Phil. The first time Tommy wouldn't be able to have a fatherly anchor by his side. It would heighten the kid's anxiety was an understatement. They were scared of what could happen, even if they've gone over what they needed to do in case Tommy had one of his panic attacks or anxiety attacks or what to do when he was overwhelmed or what to do if he had a traumatic flashback. They had gone over it all with Phil over and over days prior but the anxiety never disappeared as they knew more.