Depression

Tired

Dazais pov
At the coffee shop:
Atsushi had fallen asleep.
The others admiring him as his bangs drifted from one side to the other messing it up.
Dazai reached over and fixed his hair.
"Should we wake him up or leave it a little while he looks quite peaceful?"
Dazai asked taking his hand away.
"Give it 10 minutes I mean We're not sure when he fell asleep it could have been ages ago"
"Good point chuuya"
Dazai glanced over one more time but something caught his eye.
It was Atsushis phone.
Without hesitation he picked it up and went through his Instagram.
"What are you doing Dazai you can't go on other people phones it rude"
Aktugawa says in an irritated voice.
"Ha says the guy who literally kills people every day"
Aktugawa had no response.
"There's a lot of guys on here and he's got a type aswell"
Dazai said through giggles.
"What's his type then?"
"It looks like more gothic people but there's a few others aswell like shirtless and gym"
All three were now laughing at the poor tiger boy.
They eventually stopped and decided it was time to go so Dazai woke Atsushi up.
"Atsushi wakey wakey we need to get you home!"
Dazai yelled that in his ear.
"Aaahh Dazai don't do that you nearly killed me"
"Sorry let's go"
Dazai grabs his hand and walks out dragging Atsushi behind him waving bye to chuuya and Aktugawa.
Once they were fare enough from the shop Dazai starting asking questions.
"Do you have a girlfriend Atsushi?"
Even though Dazai knew Atsushi was gay he still asked to see what he would so.
"Umm no I don't really like girls"
"Oh really well you got a boyfriend then?"
"No sadly not"
"So you want one?"
"I guess it would be nice but I'm not like dying without one so I'm fine for now"
"Well do you have a type?"
Dazai couldn't help but giggle on that one.
"No I don't think so"
"Your insta says differently"
"What did you do?!"
"Oh calm down I went through you insta that's it and you like 100 percent have a type"
"And what would that be?"
"Goths"
Atsushi blushed a little but dinied it.
Dazai stopped trying after Atsushi kept saying no.
They finally got to Atsushis house where Dazai left because he had stuff to do.
"Remember to eat something Atsushi please send me a pic of you eating it or else!"
"Okai?"
And then Dazai left.
Atsushis pov:
He got in and went straight to the kitchen and got an apple.
He hadn't eaten in so long it made him feel so sick just looking at it.
But he pushed down those feelings and ate half sending a pic to Dazai.
And he responds with a happy face emoji.
After that Atsushi spat out trying he apple in his mouth and made his way to the bathroom.
⚠️ trigger warning⚠️

He got to the bathroom locking the door behind him.
He kneeled down Infront of the toilet and something must have triggered his brain because he didn't need to make himself sick he just started vomiting.
It ended after a few minutes and he sat there he didn't want to admit it but he was some what proud of himself for making his body do that.
He stared at his body in the reflection of his broken mirror in discuss.
He went in the cupboard and opened up a new pack of razors.
Picking one out and breaking it so it was easier to hold.
He pushed it up against his thigh because his arms were now covered in scars.
Line after line blood now dripping on the floor.
He stopped after he felt light headed.
⚠️tw over ⚠️

He cleaned up and went to bed now feeling very tired almost like he could sleep forever.