Eunomia

Chapter 71 "His darkness, her light"

~Leoni~

The truth is I never get to fully understand Sebastian's behavior or thoughts, I didn't know how that twisted mind of him worked, what is ironic because Sebastian knew how everybody's mind worked.

I didn't meet him when he was alive, he didn't talked about his life either. What I'm completely sure about is that he's much more broken than he shows, I know he has lose, lose so much. After all... isn't that what it means to be broken?

Lose, lose what you love.

Feel, feel a suffocating pain.

And pretend you don't feel at all for getting rid of that pain.

Every vampire has it way for getting through death, Sebastian has his own.

Maybe I haven't known Sebastian when he was innocently alive, but I have known him when he was painfully death for more than three hundred years now. During all those years I have got the chance to know Sebastian enough for being sure of a couple of things;

One, he provoked death to forget about his own one.

Two, he liked to play, with food above all,

I didn't know all the details of that perverse game he had with that girl he called Lizbeth, normally I just didn't care, if I had to mind Sebastian's business every time he has a new twisted purpose I would die a second time.

I didn't see how much this game got out of hands until today, I didn't see how much Sebastian cared, how much he was involved without him realizing it, until it was too late for getting out.

I didn't understood until that day how that game changed everything, how it apparently changed them both, how it made the heart of a bloody and deadly vampire want to beat again, how far was Sebastian to even think of making what he wanted at the beginning, the reason why the game started, because that day I understood that...

She illuminated his darkness, but he was so blinded by it that he didn't realize that the light he craved so badly was actually darker than his own.

For very first time in his death, Sebastian found something he lost more than three hundred years ago, light. Because he saw his darkness reflected in her light, which is the reason why he clung to it with everything he had left, the reason why he wouldn't have mind giving his last breath for seeing a brief sparkle of that light, the reason why he didn't saw how dark it was.

✯ ✯ ✯

It took me some time to figure out what the hell was going on. The moment I saw that picture of my brother I knew that night wouldn't end well and it didn't. Jason was dead, the brother that taught me I could be whoever I wanted and that Cristel Beauliue was just a creation of our parents while Léonore could be much more than that had died. He has been a year death and I hadn't even realized.

After all these 17 years without seeing him, today I did it but not the way I wished, he had hurt me with each of his memories and tricks that were making me feel in a way I never thought I would feel, as if someone had broken my heart because that was exactly what my brother's death did, tear me apart. I felt guilty and that annoyed me because I think that was what the evil ghost that looked like my brother wanted.

Ambrose was in the same condition as me, he had seen Beatrice for first time since a hundred years and what's worse, after Sandy died. He was busy being lost in his own mind that might be scary right now.

That was the reason why, when Bryony ran away and Sebastian followed her, none of us could move to go with them.