How do you heal?

Chapter 67: A Choice

On the ride back to the compound Annie had sobered up a little. She was no longer dizzy but she still had a lightheaded dreamy feel to her. Although that may have been from having to hold onto Bucky for thirty minutes. Along with her inebriation, her anger and frustration had dissipated too and she just wanted to grab a glass of water and some tylenol and get to bed. They rode into the parking garage and Bucky pulled into a spot by the elevators. Annie wasted no time in getting off the bike and removing her helmet. She nearly sprinted to the elevator doors in hopes that she could get on and close them before Bucky made it over. No such luck. Annie had squeezed herself into the corner and tried to put as much space as she could between them but Bucky leaned against the back wall, mere inches from her, as if they hadn't just had it out on a street at one in the morning. When the doors opened again she rushed out, but stopped in the hall just before entering the kitchen and bent down to take off her boots. They were heavy and she was exhausted, she also wanted to linger in the kitchen for a while and hoped Bucky would walk by her and go to his own room now. Again, no such luck. He stopped beside her.

Annie straightened, boots in hand. "You don't need to wait for me, I can make it to my own room from here."

Bucky just crossed his arms. "A deals a deal, I said home and to bed. Then you can be done with me."

Annie rubbed at her temples. "Whatever." She said and walked into the kitchen. She set her boots down by the island and went to the sink. Reaching into a cabinet she took out a glass and as it filled she found the tylenol and popped two pills in her mouth. She turned off the faucet and brought the glass to her lips, taking a large gulp before setting the glass in the sink to be dealt with in the morning. Bucky now stood waiting at the end of the hall, her boots in his hand. He made a sweeping gesture to indicate she lead the way. I wonder if Tony would still kick him out. Exhausted both physically and emotionally she just did as he'd indicated. Twenty feet down the hall she had finally made it to her door. Standing in front of it she held out her hand and waited for Bucky to give her her boots. When he did she turned her back on him and reached for the handle.

"Annie." He whispered softly.

She thumped her head on the door and groaned. "What...what else could you possibly want, Bucky?"

"Why did you stay?"

Annie didn't understand the question so she flipped herself around, her back now pressed against the door. "What are you talking about?"

Bucky leaned back against his own door and looked at the ground. "Last year, before the accords and...and the rest of it. You were leaving. You were going to go home. So why did you stay?"

She let out a dry laugh. Maybe it was the exhaustion, or maybe it was the last remnants of her intoxication but she answered him honestly. "I wasn't leaving to go home, Bucky. I was leaving to be with you, wherever that took me. Because as stupid as it sounds now you were my home, at least I thought you were. And without you this job was the only thing I had that made me feel useful, like I had a purpose. So I stayed."

He looked up at her. She thought he was her home. He'd loved her, still loved her, and he thought she had loved him. He'd never meant to hurt her and he never really wanted to leave her but he'd needed to get his mind right, and back then he wasn't sure if he honestly ever would. So he'd let her go so she could live her life and be happy. "I thought you would be better off without me."

She rolled her eyes. "That's just it, Buck. YOU thought. So YOU decided and YOU left. I never had a choice in the matter."

Bucky saw it then, the want in her eyes. Under all the anger, pain and sadness she still wanted him. He still had a chance. He walked towards her slowly and took the boots from her hand, tossing them to the ground. He placed his hands on the door on either side of her, his face barely an inch from hers.

"What are you doing?" She whispered.

"Giving you back your choice."

She sucked in a breath at the shock of what he just said and the scent of him, leather and pine, flooded her senses making her mind travel back in time. Before the tears, regret and feelings of not being enough from the last year. To when this was all she wanted. He was all she wanted. She trailed her fingers up his torso, his neck, and took his face in her hands but she didn't say a word. She just nodded. Then his mouth was on hers, her body being pressed into the door by his and she no longer felt exhausted. After a few minutes of roaming hands and breathless kisses Bucky reached behind Annie's thighs, pulling her up and wrapping her legs around him.

With one hand she reached down and fumbled for the handle. "Buck." She said and he grunted in response. "Get the door."

"Yes, ma'am."

The solid surface disappeared from behind her and they crossed the threshold into her room. Bucky kicking the door closed behind them and walking to set Annie down in front of the bed.

He pulled back slightly in the darkness and said, "If I'd have known getting you drunk was all it would take to get you to talk to me I'd have been pouring drinks weeks ago." Before nipping at her neck.

"Sarge?"

A smile broke out on his face at her use of the old nickname. "Yeah, Sweetheart?"

"Stop talking and take your clothes off."