How do you heal?

Chapter 11: What Have I Done

Bucky woke to pain shooting through his back and the shattered remnants of a couch surrounding him. What the hell happened? Wait, this is Annie's couch. He shot up frantically looking around the room for her. Where was she? Was she hurt?

"Whoa Buck." He heard Steve say and whipped his head toward the sound. Steve stood near the door, hands raised in front of him, ready for a fight. "You with me, pal?" Steve asked cautiously.

Bucky nodded and stood slowly, "What happened? Where is Annie?"

Steve lowered his hands and took a tentative step forward. "I'm not sure what happened, Jarvis woke Nat and me up saying Annie called for help. We ran in..." He paused for a moment with a sad look on his face. "We ran in and she was pretty banged up, Buck. I had to pull you off her and I told Nat to get her out of here. I would think they are headed to the infirmary."

Bucky felt his stomach drop. What did I do? He started pacing. "Fuck, is she okay? How bad is she hurt?"

"I don't know. Bruce is probably on his way to check her out right now. Why don't we sit down and you can try and tell me what you remember? Give them some time to get things figured out downstairs, okay?" Steve said.

Bucky looked around the room trying to jog his memory. The ruined couch, her nightstand was knocked over and the lamp shattered, there was blood on the walls and carpet and he saw her phone laying shattered on the floor. He felt bile rise in his throat. "Yeah, yeah that's fine but...can we get out of here?"

They sat in the kitchen. Bucky had explained to Steve the last thing he remembered was falling asleep watching a movie before Jarvis relayed Banner's run down of Annie's injuries. Steve asked Jarvis to have Banner check on Bucky when he finished with Annie. He tried to protest but Steve insisted stating he had thrown Bucky fairly hard and just wanted to be sure he was okay too.

As they waited for Banner to come Bucky sat at the island with his head in his hands. "So you want to tell me what you were doing in there in the first place?" Steve asked.

Bucky looked over at him, "Watching a movie." He replied, slightly confused.

"That's not what I mean and you know it." Steve said with a strangely playful tone but Bucky just stared at him not understanding. "Every time I turn around you two are together now and if you recall I watched you flirt your way through half of Brooklyn so I know what it looks like. So what's going on?"

"Nothing is going on." Bucky replied sharply.

"Oh come on Buck." Steve scoffed.

Bucky had admitted to himself weeks ago that he was developing feelings for Annie but with the knowledge of her husband he had done all he could to push them aside out of respect for her loss. So it made him nervous that Steve had realized the truth because it meant he hadn't been hiding it very well and he didn't want Annie to realize also and push him away. But he'd just attacked her and she was going to push him away anyway. But what if she doesn't, surely she would understand he wasn't in control. Who was he kidding, even if she did understand, did forgive him, how could he forgive himself? Angry and upset, Bucky snapped at his friend. "Sorry my days aren't filled with hero planning and PSA recordings, Steve. It's not like I have anything else to do or anyone else to talk to around here!"

"Bucky." Steve started but just then the elevator dinged and Banner stepped out.

"Just drop it, Steve." He growled and Steve just stood and went to greet the Doctor.

"Bruce, thanks for coming up. How's Annie?" Steve asked.

Banner shuffled up to the counter and put down a handful of supplies before he replied. "She woke up just before I left. She was joking with Nat so she's at least in good spirits. Which is good, between that and the pain meds she should make it through her flight okay." He finished as he poked and prodded at Bucky's back before moving to shine a light in his eyes.

Bucky stopped him, "What flight?" He asked.

"Oh uh, I ran into Tony on my way up. Once I'm done here I have to go back down and put Annie's arm in a sling and load her up a to-go bag of meds, I guess Tony is sending her home to recover for a few weeks." He replied before returning to his exam.

Bucky felt his stomach drop again, at this point it was through the ground. "She's going to Ohio?"

Steve looked at Bucky eyebrows raised as Banner shrugged. "Tony just said he'd called her family and he was sending her to them. I'm not sure where that is."

She had left there because it hurt too much and now it was his fault she was being forced to go back. She definitely would not forgive him for this.