Your Addiction, Simon Ghost Riley x Reader

One body, one soul

[a/n] Smut warning, first time writing it, don't judge too much 🤭

...

As soon as I left the room, I realized that I had made a huge mistake. Now they knew I had been lying to them. I was afraid that Simon wouldn't trust me anymore.

When I got into my room, I slammed the door and tried to calm down. With my back against the door, I tried to slow my breathing, but my mind couldn't stop wondering what Simon was thinking.

A few minutes passed and I was about to take a shower and go to sleep, but I heard someone's footsteps. Of course it was him. And locking the door at that very moment would have been a very unwise decision.

Therefore, frozen in that position, I continued to stand. My heart raced a bit as I leaned harder against the door, fearing he'd break in. It was clear that he was not planning on forgetting our conversation at all.

It wasn't long before those footsteps stopped right outside my room. As I turned to the side, I put one ear to the door and listened to what was happening on the other side. Nothing but deep breathing could be heard.

I was not sure what to do. I couldn't decide which one to choose - should I let him in and tell him the whole truth, or should I stay away from him and lose the relationship we had? I had no idea how he would react to me telling him the whole story. But maybe I was overreacting? Maybe Simon wasn't interested in continuing that conversation? Perhaps he didn't actually care?

And so I opened the door, too scared to see him standing there. The world became quiet the moment I gazed into his dark eyes. I was looking at him and saw Ghost standing in front of me, not the man I fell in love with.

I opened the door a bit wider as if I was trying to invite him to my room. Seconds later, it was only him and me in the bedroom. Once again it felt like we were complete strangers. 

He watched the snow fall through the window. I couldn't see his facial expressions, which made it even more difficult for me to calm down.

Like this we kept standing in silence for what felt like an eternity. I didn't want to start the conversation - not because I was too stubborn to do that, but because I didn't know how to explain myself. And as I was slowly losing my hope and patience I turned around and decided to go to the bathroom. But the moment I took my first step, I heard him ask me:

"What happened out there?" I heard him walk up behind me. Now he was just a few steps away from me, unable to see my tears forming.

I realized lying wasn't worth it. If I wanted to make us both happy, I knew I had to take some responsibility and admit my mistakes.

"I didn't follow the rules. My intention was to finish the mission and let you guys leave that hell"

He didn't say anything but I felt him get closer to me. He pressed his chest against my back, then I felt his hands wrap around my waist. Like a warm blanket on a cold body, I felt secure in his arms. It seemed like the world around us was blurry, just like my dreams.

"Didn't I tell you not to do anything stupid?" He whispered in my ear.

"Is that all you're gonna say?" I was genuinely confused as I didn't expect Simon to be this calm.

"You wish" he said so softly that I began to wonder what kind of intentions he might have.

He turned me around, and we were facing each other. He stared into my eyes and I felt the tension between us grow. Then he grabbed my one hand and placed my open palm on his heart. I could feel it pounding faster than ever, him squeezing me so tightly. When I looked into his eyes, I was sure they expressed love, safety, appreciation, and protection.