the Devil and the Sea

30| Party: his hoodie

Half past ten, we're heading to Phil's. I go out into the night in just a tank top and short shorts. It's cool outside, but I don't take any outerwear with me: perhaps Vincent will give me some of his own.

I feel a slight tingle in my legs as we walk to Phil and Vincent's place: I don't know what will happen next. Of course, I'm not going to stand on the sidelines and let things take their course. I'm going to act in my own interests and I don't care who I have to sacrifice.

I wish Ricky didn't come with us, but he keeps up with me. His suspicions cause irritation, taking away a lot of energy, but nothing can be done. I can't blame him for knowing me too well.

I know that Vincent will sooner or later offer to take a walk with him, but I feel a cowardice unusual for me. If we stay alone, something is sure to happen. Maybe Vincent just decided to sleep with me, so he started showing up. Although, what am I talking about? Naturally, he is absolutely determined to get into my underpants. I get upset when I think about it. I would like him to show attention in a romantic way without sexual overtones, but this does not happen. He doesn't take me seriously because I'm terrible when I'm with Ricky. But he will not even dare to tell me anything about this, because he himself has a girlfriend. He shouldn't have kissed me himself. But he did it.

Everything is going well. I would say that everything is going according to my plan, but that would be another lie. I decided to improvise, but it does not affect in a bad way. For example: Vincent asked for my number, and what if it's not a small victory? Of course I refused, but if he asks again, maybe I'll change my mind.

"I like his cheekbones, they are so expressive and high." Ricky says, and I listen to what he and Marina are talking about.

"Yes, he is so handsome! Have you seen how perfect his nose is?" I hear admiration in Marina's voice, and when I understand that we are talking about Vincent, I am even more surprised.

"It's true, I would also like one for myself," Ricky puts his hand on my shoulders and pulls me to him.

It's funny how Ricky is jealous of me and Vincent, but at the same time admires something good in his appearance.

How funny. On one hand, Ricky is jealous of me flirting with Vincent. On the other, he's the one admiring Vincent's good looks .

"Your nose suits you better than the one you want," I notice and Ricky kisses the top of my head.

"He seems to have been fat before," Ricky continues the discussion with Marina.

How, I wonder, he was able to determine this?

"Yes, he said that he was full in childhood," Marina picks up.

I understand that Ricky is trying to elevate himself by noticing Vincent's "flaws", and I just grin at his childishness.

Ricky squeezes my hand tightly and says:

"Yes, he is an ordinary guy, not handsome, but quite attractive."

I stare at him with all my eyes.

What the hell is happening right now?

"He looks like a nerd with glasses," Marina repeats my words, and the two of them laugh.

I'd say they look pathetic talking about Vincent, but I don't feel like fighting for who knows what. If I stand up for Vincent now, I'll make Ricky even more suspicious. And I'm being pretty cheeky as it is.

Marina freely enters Phil and Vincent's yard first, and we remain waiting by the fence. How is it that she is closer to them than I am?

Phil is actually my friend. But for some reason I can no longer enter without an invitation.