the Devil and the Sea

43| Walking on a knife's edge

I make coffee, and a hundred times I try to remember what Vincent said: does he want coffee or not? Probably yes. He usually agrees.

I glance out the window: light blond hair blowing in the wind, and my hands remember how soft they are. Deep down I know the answer, but I don't want it to come out, this shame must remain within me. I will ruin this desire by not allowing it to be born. All relationships have sad endings, especially with me. I want Vincent to remain a vivid memory that will not be overshadowed by a sad outcome.

I go out with three mugs of coffee and put it on the table on the terrace, sit down on the bench where Vincent was sitting. Now he's showing Ricky how to do some of the soccer freestyle tricks. I can't help but notice that Ricky is very capable, and everything is easily given to him, no matter what he undertakes. I feel a bit of guilt for treating him badly, no matter how much he deserves it. One look from him makes me feel like a fucking bitch - well, how can I betray those green eyes that look at me so lovingly?

I shift my eyes to Vincent, who is showing confident handling of the ball as well. He throws the ball up slightly, and circles it twice with the foot he used to throw it. The ball lands on his toes, and he again repeats these movements several times in a row. He's so into the ball dance that I can't take my eyes off him.

As soon as Vincent fails, he explodes with enthusiasm: he did better than he had planned. Our eyes meet. He seems to want to make sure that I saw his triumph, and I realize that I am admiringly staring back.

Now he slowly shows his movements to Ricky, as if he is explaining how to repeat the trick.

"Coffee is ready," I shout, and start drinking mine without waiting for the guys.

My attention is drawn to Vincent's phone, which lies on the table directly to my right - what kind of stupid habit is it to put the screen facing down?

The case on the iPhone is strange: it looks like it's made of tree bark, although it's just a pattern on the plastic case.

My heart is beating wildly at the thought that I can find out what is inside the phone. Find out all the information about Vincent... I'm starting to feel dizzy with the hope of knowing everything about him. Find out if he is a liar or not. Hands in a tremor, the air on the terrace seems to have become less.

I already know that Vincent is as much of a liar as I am.

I take the phone and tap the screen. The lock screen shows a picture of a view of planet Earth from space, I press a second time and the phone asks for a password.

Crap.

What did I expect? And what's even weirder is why the hell am I even looking at Vincent's phone? After a minute of studying the case and a couple of futile attempts to guess the pin code, I put the phone aside.

Vincent seems to have noticed me fiddling with his phone, but he didn't do anything. If I caught him doing something like this, I would immediately stop him, and it doesn't matter if my phone is password protected. Maybe he didn't notice? I'm ashamed that I wanted to rummage through his phone. I want to leave, but just as I'm about to get up, Vincent walks onto the terrace and sits next to me.

Of course, he noticed that I took his phone, I can see it in his eyes.

"Cool case." I'm trying to get over the embarrassment.

"Do you want me to show you where I live?" Vincent asks, but he does not even wait for an agreement, he takes the phone and, without hiding, dials a combination of numbers, which unlocks the phone.

I follow every movement of his finger across the screen with my eyes - three, six, nine, eight, eight, eight. The numbers that will open the treasured door behind which I can find more information about Vincent, about his relationship and more.